“One more.” I flipped her over onto her stomach, pulled her hips up, and entered her from behind. “Give me one more.”
“I can’t… it’s too much…”
“You can.” I started moving again, the new angle letting me go even deeper. “You will. Because I told you to.”
My hand found her clit again, rubbing in fast circles while I pounded into her. She buried her face in the pillow, muffling her screams, her whole body trembling.
“Don’t hide from me.” I grabbed her shoulder and pulled her up so her back was against my chest, my arm wrapped around her waist, my fingers still working her clit. “I want to hear you. Every sound. Every moan. Let it out.”
She came again with a scream that probably woke up the neighbors. Her body clamped down on me so hard I couldn’t hold back anymore.
“Fuck—” I buried myself deep and let go, spilling inside her with a groan that came from somewhere primal. Somewhere beyond thought or reason.
We collapsed together onto the bed, both of us gasping, hearts pounding, bodies slick with sweat and shower water and each other.
For a long moment, neither of us spoke. Just lay there tangled together, breathing slowly returning to normal.
Then Zainab laughed.
“What?” I asked, pulling her closer.
“Nothing.” She turned in my arms, pressing a kiss to my chest. “I just… I really needed that.”
“Me too.” I stroked her back, tracing lazy patterns on her skin. “Me too.”
She was quiet for a moment. Then: “We’re gonna get through this. You know that, right? Rashid. Meech. All of it. We’re gonna get Yusef back and build that bakery and have a life together.”
“I know.”
“Do you believe it?”
I thought about everything that lay ahead. The blood that would have to be spilled. The relationships that would have to be severed. The man I’d have to become to protect the people I loved.
Then I looked at her. At the woman who’d brought light into my darkness. Who’d given me something worth fighting for.
“Yeah,” I said finally. “I believe it.”
She smiled and nestled closer, her head on my chest, her hand over my heart.
Within minutes, she was asleep.
I stayed awake a while longer. Listening to the waves outside. Feeling her warmth against me.
Tomorrow, the war would begin.
But tonight, I had everything I needed.
30
ZAINAB
Mehar was giving me a whole TED Talk and I didn’t remember buying a ticket.
She’d been pacing Prime’s living room for the past hour, barefoot, wearing a path into his expensive-ass rug like she was training for a marathon. Her hands were moving like she was conducting an orchestra, and her eyes had that wild look that reminded me of those true crime documentaries where the neighbor says “she always seemed so quiet.”
“You should’ve SEEN me, Zainab.” She spun around, damn near knocking over a lamp. “I was like…I was like a whole different person. The gun in my hands, the bullets flying, the glass shattering everywhere…” She made explosion sounds with her mouth like a five-year-old playing Call of Duty. “I’ve never felt anything like that. NEVER. My whole life I’ve been told to shut up, sit down, cover up, submit, submit, submit. And the other night I just?—”
“Mehar.” I held up my hands in what I hoped was a calming gesture. “Girl. You need to breathe. Sit your ass down. Drink some water. Something.”
