‘Only because I struggle to find clothes that suit my figure,’ she explained, already hating herself for saying it, because it suggested she was some kind of monster. But she was damned if Holly would be the one to point it out first, which she was about to do going by the way she opened her sour-puss mouth.
‘Well, you’re fantastic! You should go into fashion. There’s a lot of curvy actresses coming into the industry – a change I wholeheartedly agree with. But they really struggle to find red carpet dresses for the Oscars and Golden Globes. You’d make a killing with your designs.’
Ellie laughed. ‘I’m a nurse, not a designer.’
Jessica gave her a firm look that suggested she never gave empty flattery. ‘Believe me, you can be whatever you want to be. I’m not saying it isn’t hard work, but no dream is impossible. And who says you can’t be both?’
NHS staff shortages, lack of money, lack of sleep?But Ellie didn’t bother Jessica with those mundane hurdles. Instead, she gave her an appreciative nod. ‘Thank you.’ She meant it, because it was nice to have Alex’s mum believe in her. When had her own mum believed in or encouraged her?
A quick glance at Alex showed he agreed with his mother. Ellie had always faked her own confidence, choosing positivity over negativity, but there had been limits. Not only with work but in her personal life too. A glass ceiling that she was too scared to smash through, in case she plummeted to the bottom and was forced to start again.
Dare she aim higher, hope for the impossible?
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Twilight began to descend around them like an indigo curtain, while in contrast the party atmosphere rose considerably with the arrival of a swing band. The bride and groom had their first dance, and cut their pink tiered cake, which was taller than Hannah – Ellie snapped some photos and sent them to her.
Everyone ate and drank, the tables mixing and mingling with an easy and exuberant mood that made Ellie drunk with possibility. Here, everyone was equal; there were no self-centred divas – she imagined the Kings would refuse to be close friends with anyone like that anyway. Instead, a world-renowned singer was prodded to sing a ballad, while an Oscar-winning actor played the guitar. The crowd and singer laughed good-naturedly when he missed a chord.
‘Shall we go for a walk?’ Alex asked huskily and a tingle of awareness ran down her spine as he offered her his hand. He was incredibly dashing when he wanted to be.
Ellie could do with a change of scene. The party was lovely, but also a little overwhelming with so many famous faces. She was sure she’d bumped into a rock star coming out of the loo just now.
They walked down to the beach, the water glistening in the moonlight. The lapping of the waves grew louder as the sounds of the party faded. Alex’s warm hand wrapped around hers, his thumb idly stroking her skin in a loving caress.
Ellie sighed, wondering how she’d feel when she returned to the city noise of car horns, millions of people and trains.
The island was beautiful, but also unreal. Like she was living in a dream that would inevitably end. She didn’t want it to – not because she didn’t want to leave this island; she was resigned tothat fate. Besides, her colleagues and patients needed her, her family needed her.
Most of all, she didn’t want to lose Alex. Her chest became tight when she thought of life without him, even as she worried if she could keep up with this facade. Reality and dreams were blurring into one, and she was afraid she would lose herself.
Alex’s behaviour over the last couple of days – especially in front of his family – had made it seem like his feelings were, at least partially, real. Ellie was worried that he was beginning to believe his own lies – after all, he’d said that was how he’d fallen into the relationship with Savannah.
She sank down to sit on the sand. ‘This has been the best holiday of my life. I’m going to be so sad when it’s over.’
Alex plopped down next to her. ‘It doesn’t have to end.’
‘All holidays end. You can’t hide from the real world for ever.’
‘Thisismy real world. It could be yours too, if you wanted it to be.’ His hand reached for hers, the brush of his thumb a seductive promise.
The moon was so bright and so low she wondered if she could reach out and take it from the sky as a memento of this whole experience. She allowed herself the pleasure of staring at Alex. Admiring his black hair shifting in the gentle breeze like a raven’s feathers, she reached out and stroked it away from his eyes. She couldn’t decide if she preferred him wearing contacts like today, or with glasses. His face turned to hers and she smiled. She didn’t want the moon, she wanted Alex, and both seemed within her grasp in this magical moment.
She leaned forward and pressed her cool lips to his heated mouth. A reckless question as well as a kiss.
‘You’re breaking your own rules, Ellie.’
‘Should I stop?’
‘God, no, I couldn’t bear it.’ His hands swept into her hair as he pushed against her, rocking her onto her back into the warmsand beneath. His mouth, hips and chest pressed against hers in a strength of desire that she found thrilling and she returned his passion wholeheartedly.
Drunk on Alex’s kiss, she didn’t hear the commotion to the side until he pulled away from her. Bleary-eyed, she followed his gaze to the rest of the guests making their way to the specially chartered speedboat that would be taking Savannah and Liam to their honeymoon island.
‘Should we go and say goodbye?’ asked Ellie, her breath ragged.
His lips glistened in the moonlight, wet from their kiss. ‘They won’t miss us.’ With a quick glance to the intruding guests, Alex took her hand, pulled her to her feet and led her deeper into the shadows of the gardens towards the house. A bird flew between the foliage, causing Ellie to jump with fright, scared it might be one of the guests stumbling upon them.
Which was ridiculous – they’d been (fake)dating this whole time. Who would care if they found them walking alone in the gardens? Still, Ellie couldn’t shake the fear that he was secretly embarrassed by her, wanted to hide her away, like some guilty pleasure.
