Lily kept her eyes on his, not daring to speak.
Her throat was thick with tears.
“My lady.” He clasped her fragile hand in his large one, leaning even closer. She saw her reflection in his dark eyes, a pale ghost compared to his earthy solidity. “My lady, I know you have secrets.”
Still she refused to speak, gray eyes wide in the flare of the candles.
“Lily, will you not trust me?”
It was foolish to ask it. He knew that as soon as the words were spoken. How could she trust him, when he had just shown himself incapable of listening to her without turning on her in fury? Yet he wanted her to trust him. His pride demanded it!
His heart yearned for it.
For a long moment dark eyes gazed into gray, and then Lily gave a breathless laugh. She reached up with her free hand, hesitated, and then stroked his temple, smoothing back a lock of short dark hair.
“My lord, I have trusted you. More than you know.”
Her lips trembled as she smiled. It required all of Radulf’s self-control not to lean forward and taste them, to lose himself in the sweetness of her mouth. A terrible ache filled his chest.
This was more than want.
Madness, whispered the bitter skeptic inside him, but Radulf didn’t care. At that moment he would gladly have drowned himself in Lily’s eyes.
The abbot cleared his throat loudly.
With a sigh, Radulf leaned back to put some space between them, although he retained her hand. Lily’s eyes sparkled with tears.
“The hospitaler has come to take you to your room, lady,” the abbot said coolly. “You must be weary after your journey and in need of sleep. I have set aside a private room in my house for your use.”
“Thank you.” Lily glanced sideways at Radulf.
“The guest quarters will be our billet,” he answered her unspoken question.
Lily bowed her head and spoke calmly, only the slightest tremor betraying the depth of her feelings.
“I am very tired. I would be glad to retire now.”
As she rose, Radulf also stood. He brought her hand to his lips with a murmured, “Sleep well, mignonne.”
Lily gasped at the feel of his warm mouth once more against her skin. The gleam in his eyes spoke of desire and possession, and of longing. This might be the last time she ever saw him, and the tears filling her eyes threatened to spill over her lashes and fall. His face blurred, and she blinked to clear her vision before she replied huskily.
“And you, my lord.”
As the hospitaler led her away, she did not turn.
Trust me, Radulf had said. And the strange thing was, she had almost been prepared to do so. Until his anger, his inflexible stance on Vorgen, had made her see the danger of such an action. Like a game of chance, she would not know the outcome until it was too late.
And Lily could not afford to dice with her freedom, or mayhap her life.
Chapter 8
Bells rang from the church calling the monks to Compline, the last prayers of the day, as the hospitaler led Lily through a small courtyard. She paused, breathing deeply to calm herself.
The dark vault of the sky above her was ablaze with stars, but tonight their beauty appeared cold and distant to Lily.
She shook her head, forcing back the urge to weep. When he knew the truth, Radulf would be glad that she had gone. He would hate her. But if she had deceived him, then she was being punished for it.
Lily took another gasping breath. Time enough later to grieve. She forced herself to concentrate, to look about properly for the first time.
