I close my eyes and let her hug wrap around my heart.
“There is nothing to forgive. I was a wreck. At first, I couldn’t talk and after, I didn’t want to talk. Besides my sister, no one knew.”
“I’m so happy that you came, Della. I am here for you now.” She whispers.
“I am so happy I came to see you, too.” I breathe, not letting go. “In a way, I have to thank Leah for it.”
Her brows shoot up as she stretches her arms and looks me in the eyes.
“What has that snake got to do with it?”
So, I tell her about the storm of the last week—the Excalibur, meeting Dorian, the lake house, and everything that followed till today when Leah ambushed me at the office.
By the time I’m done pouring out my soul, the sky bleeds red into the waves. I’ve drawn absent circles and a heart made of two D’s, back to back, that the waves came to erase. My chest feels raw, but a lot lighter.
“I thought I was done with Dorian… finally erased him. But at the lake house…” I whisper, clutching the ruby. “I realized he never left my heart. I just forced myself not to think of him, not to feel.”
“I remember you were so in love, and over the top happy back then,” she says gently. “This kind of love is a dormant fire, Della. If it reignited, why did you run now?”
“I had to. If I’d stayed, I’d be in his apartment now, losing myself. He said there was more he needed to tell me… I remember. It sure was about this,” My chest tightens, ribs aching like they can’t hold my heart inside. “I know that Leah is a snake. She lied and deceived us both. But still… why did he takehermoney?”
“Ask him, Della,” she says, her gaze steady and unyielding. Let him explain it.”
“I know, I know…” I whisper, my voice cracking. “I’m afraid, Chiquita. I’m afraid I’ll never stand without him. I know he can and will put the world at my feet, but who am I without him?”
Silvia pulls back, her look serious.
“You're the woman who survived. You're the one who built a career back home, from nothing. He doesn't define your strength, Della—he's just the man who has truly seen it. Forget who you are without him—who do you want to be for yourself?”
“For five years, I lived a mime of a life, Silvia. I wore the right clothes, accomplished all the tasks, and smiled at the right moments. But it was a performance in a silent movie. The colors were out, the laughter was soundless and the joy was just a gesture. I was lost. But with Dorian, those last days, life turned back on. And now, I’m terrified of losing it again. I need to find my fire. On my own.”
She pulls back, framing my face in her hands.
“Then it’s time you live. And learn something new. Love yourself.”
She smiles, a spark of her usual joy returning.
“Girl time, Della. Lots of it. I’ll take care of that.” Her expression softens. “And… therapy. You need it. Not as weakness, but as power. I know someone in Chicago. A friend of a friend. You can start online, whenever you’re ready.”
I nod, because she’s right. My sister told me the same. I just hadn’t been ready to hear it. Until now.
When the night chill creeps in, we head back to the house. I curl up on her couch, the sound of waves filling the silence. My phone lies dark on the table, a weight I’ve avoided for too long. My fingers tremble as I unlock the screen.
Twenty-seven missed calls and twelve messages from Dorian.
‘Della where are you? Please let me know if you are ok.’
‘I know about Leah. I can explain.’
‘Della, please… I am dead worried. Where are you?’
‘I am so sorry. You are right to feel betrayed. Please let me explain.’
‘I love you.’
I stop reading and type quickly, before my courage can flee.
‘I’m in San Diego, at Silvia’s. Can’t talk. Not yet. I need time.’
