Why did I agree to hang out with Xander?
Because you’ve never wanted anyone as much as you want him.
You’re in way over your head.
My attraction toward Xander has only gotten stronger throughout the day. I’m so comfortable around him, and every time he looks at me or touches me, I get a rush of endorphins.
I gaze over at the brown bag I put on my counter, pull out a blueberry muffin, and eat it. The sweet things he did for me today, like buying me this treat, trying to carry my bag, and kissing me on the cheek race around my mind, never mind how he waited for me to make sure I was okay in the locker room after the Damon incident.
Damon. He was so angry today. I pull out my phone and text him.
“I know what you believe, but I’ve never lied to you, and I’m not lying now. We were over when I met him.”
“You’re such a whore,” comes flying back, and my gut flips.
“Stop this. You’re better than this. I realize you’re hurt, but this isn’t the way to act. I would never have cheated on you.”
“Doesn’t even matter. Even if you got with him after we broke up, within a week, you were with someone else. WHORE.”
I stare at the screen in shock. I shouldn’t be surprised at Damon’s cruelty after the last encounter I had with him.
“I’m sorry you feel that way. From now on, don’t talk to me or touch me.” There. At least I have a written trail if I need it for any reason.
Better not tell Xander about this. He will flip and have me in HR first thing tomorrow.
Xander. My pulse creeps up, thinking about him. And I need to stop it. I remind myself he still has feelings for Billie, and he may never lose them.
I panic and consider canceling on him but can’t seem to do it. So instead, I tell myself I’ll only be friends with him. That’s what he needs right now anyways—friends who care about him and can help him.
Keep it in the friendship zone, I tell myself, right as the door buzzes. I push the button, and his voice comes through the speaker.
It doesn’t take long before he’s knocking on my door. I open it, and he has on the black wool cap he looks super-hot in. He steps inside, he bends down, and kisses me on the cheek.
I freeze for the third time today.
“Sorry. I don’t know why I keep doing that,” he says.
“It’s okay. Come in. Here, let me take your coat.”
He steps farther inside and removes his jacket. He’s wearing a long-sleeved knit top that hugs his body perfectly and a pair of designer jeans. My heart beats a little faster.
Why does he have to look so good?
He hands me his coat, and I put it in my closet. When I turn around, he’s standing still with a strange expression on his face.
“Xander?”
His face is pale.
“What’s wrong?”
He shakes his head. “I feel like I’ve been here before.”
A chill moves through me, and I softly reply, “You have.”
“No, this is different. Give me a minute if you don’t mind?”
“Take all the time you need.”
