My heart tries to escape through my throat.
"Well, spit it out, son," Jacob demands.
I blurt out, "Sir, I want to ask for your permission to marry Willow."
He goes absolutely still at my pronouncement.
It's not the reaction I imagined, and it throws me off. My heart slams so hard against my rib cage, I try not to wince. I rush to fill the silence. "I realize I've made a lot of bad decisions in my life. But since I returned, I've worked hard to redeem myself."
Jacob lifts on eyebrow.
A bout of nausea hits me.
I continue babbling. "I was an idiot to destroy The Buck and Bruise, but I paid Willow back. I stopped drinking whiskey, and I uh…" I release an anxious breath.
"You what?" he questions, leaning closer.
The same sense of shame I felt when I told Willow and the others tries to pull me under. I swallow hard, pushing forward. "I've stopped gambling. I attended Gamblers Anonymous meetings every day for a few months, but now I only go once a week. I'm not sure if I really need to go anymore, but I figured it doesn't hurt."
Jacob doesn't speak, and his silence doesn't help my nerves.
My mouth turns dry. I try not to flinch under his stare.
I add, "I also saved my winnings over the last seven months. Well, besides paying Willow back and buying her a ring. I found some land that would be good for a riding school, and I'm going to put an offer on it."
"Riding school?" Jacob questions.
I nod. "Yes, sir. I've had a good run, but I think it's time to hang up my boots. Willow will always have to travel for her career, and we can't both be on the road when we have a baby."
"Is she pregnant?" he asks in a rumble.
"No! Sorry. I suppose I didn't express that correctly. But we want a big family. When she's gone, I'll be here. And going out on top is the best. I can get off the road, head up the school, and have a team of coaches who travel."
He just stares at me.
"Please say something, sir," I beg.
He leans back, pushing his fingertips together, keeping his intense gaze on mine.
An eternity passes before he says, "Do you think the land you're looking to buy is enough?"
My chest tightens. "I think it'll be enough to start a school. I can expand it down the road."
His lips twitch, but his tone remains flat. "You remember the Ashpost cabin?"
"The one where…" I stop myself from sayingwhere Willow gave herself to me.
"Where what?" Jacob questions.
I clear my throat. "The one where your great-great-great grandaddy settled?"
"Great-great for me," he corrects.
"Oh. Yeah. Sorry."
He takes another moment to assess me.
I force myself not to shift in the seat.
