I know you will be relieved by this news.
Was this the purpose of her letter? To inform him that the guilt she felt over the speculation had finally forced her hand? It was very convenient for the ledger to turn up now. He wondered for a moment whether or not she had made up a ledger or had always had it in her possession? A red-hot rage engulfed his body. After everything they had been through it had come down to this? A payment?
He banged on the roof and told the driver to take him to Blackhurst House. He would tell her he didn’t want her damn money.
But there was more. His hands shook as he turned to the next page.
Secondly, I want to explain what I meant by my first note. I wanted to release you from any duty you might have felt regarding our agreement. I was not releasing you from my affections. I could not even if I wanted to.
What? Was this meant to mollify him? Make him forget about her part in the speculation? Although she had never directly implicated herself in her husband’s schemes, always protesting her innocence. And he had believed her. Did he believe her still? Confusion waltzed with anger and bowed to hope in a dance of intertwining emotions. Part of him wanted more than anything to believe. He frantically read the rest of the letter hoping there might be something to help him decide how he felt about her.
I wanted our future to be on equal footing, with no misunderstandings, but in the process only muddledeverything up. I am so very sorry. I would never intentionally hurt you.
If I could use my voice I would tell you, you are my heart, my soul, my life. I cannot seem to breathe without you.
Oliver, I love you. You are not nothing to me, you are everything. Everything I have ever needed. Everything I have ever wanted. Everything that I am.
Please come back to me.
Lisbeth
He was shaking. Was he really her heart, as she was his? The anger he had felt a few minutes ago was now directed at himself. He should have known, he should have waited, and he should have taken her in his arms and kissed her and proposed to her on those damn steps as he had intended. Instead, he had let his own insecurities come between them. He cared nothing about the money. Although it was nice to know he would be able to pay the bank and use what little capital he had left to rebuild.
But it all meant nothing if he didn’t have her.
Lisbeth.
The carriage jerked to a stop, and he flew from it like his pants were on fire. He raced up the steps of Blackhurst House, slipping slightly on the wet stoop. He bashed on the door.
Rollands wore a surprised expression when he opened the door. “Lord Bellamy?”
He didn’t wait to be asked in but made his way into the entryway. “Yes, yes. Where is she?”
“She’s not here.”
“What? Where the hell is she?”
“She was going to your townhouse,” Rollands replied.
“My… my townhouse? Why?”
Rolland stepped forward. “She was convinced you had not read her letter, sir. The letter I had deliveredat dawn this morning. She went to ensure you read it.”
“I’m not at my townhouse.”
“Apparently not,” Rollands replied.
“I mean it is closed up. I was on my way to Whitely Hall. I had better get back to the house.”
“Or you could wait here for her to return? I am sure Lady Fortesque would be more than pleased to converse with you.” Rollands raised a brow.
Oliver was at the door in a second. “No, it will be faster if I go to her.” He turned on his heel and raced back out into the rain.
“Back to the townhouse, John,” he instructed his driver, who simply shook his head in confusion but quickly whipped up the horses.
Oliver didn’t blame him; he felt like he was going mad. His heart was beating erratically, like it knew not what tempo to be in. His lungs were burning and his eyes stung. He put his fist to his mouth to stop the cry aching to tumble out, and Lord knows what would happen after that. He kept his gaze out the window and concentrated on the houses. Each number took him closer to Lisbeth.
Then he saw her, in a hack going the other way. He jumped out of the carriage heedless of the danger and the rain. Slipping and sliding over the cobbles, he made his way after the vehicle. It was going slowly due to the weather and the always-ridiculous traffic. After what felt like years, he finally reached the hack and swung open the door, leaping inside.
