She should be here, withme.
Ishould be keeping her safe.
Ishould be out there with Sam and West trying to find her instead of wearing a hole through the damn floor.
The more I pace, the more anxiety turns to rage in my chest. The feeling is foreign—I’ve never had anything to rage at before. Even when Dad packed me up and sent me away. Even when I found Mom dead on the bathroom floor. No, back then all I felt was helplessness. Sorrow.
For the first time in my life, my alpha roars in defiance inside my chest. He’s…he’s where this rage is coming from. I’ve always been a weaker alpha, but since bonding Jo…fuck, this is bad.
Open.
Close.
Open.
Close.
Being drugged to high hell for four years when I’d barely come into my designation hasn’t offered me ample opportunity to keep my instincts in check. I’m going to have to get this under wraps before I lose my shit.
It had tested every ounce of my strength watching her fight last night, but I could see her. She had beensafe. Now, I don’t know where she is, or what the fuck is going on.
Forcing my feet to stop pacing, I close my eyes, exhaling through my nose.
I am in control.
I am in control—
A feeling of intense panic takes over my chest, and suddenly it’s like I can’t breathe.
Jo.
She’s scared. Where is she? When has my Fireball ever beenscared? It’s not right. It’s like…it’s like pigs flying. Wait. That’s not true. Because nowadays, I’m sure that there’s some technology that would allow fucked up scientists to attach bird wings to pigs and make them fly.
But Jo being scared?
That wouldneverhappen.
Then, just as suddenly as the terror invaded my senses, it recedes, and I’m left empty and hollow.
Which, somehow, is even worse than before. Now, I have no idea what’s happening. Did she get knocked out? Did somethingelsehappen?
No. My breathing is erratic as I concentrate, trying to find the little ball of fire that’s Jo inside my chest. She’s there. Shehasto be.
And she is. Just…small and muted. She’s shielding me from her emotions even though I can tell she’s just as panicked as before.
How could she do that? How could she cut me off?
Logically, I know she’s trying to protect me, but for once, justonce, I wish she’d let me protect her.
I’m spiraling. I can’t spiral now.
Open.
Close.
Open—
My eyes open, and a guttural scream rips out of my throat as my arm rears back, launching my one comfort as hard as I can.
