My eyes are glued to the level of water as it rises, but I can't seem to make myself move from my hunched-over position. In fact, I’m starting to feel cold, despite the heat of the water.
My mind, which had been blissfully silent when I was in Hayden’s arms, starts to race.
I did it. I’m out. It’sdone. I saved Mabel. But…now what? I can’t pretend that Mabel didn’t admit that she actually did murder her entire pack.
Not that I judge her for it. Not for one single second would I judge her for doing the exact same thing I’ve done. But…I was always doing it for her.
She says she did it for me.
“Shit, Baby,” Hayden’s voice has me jumping, “you’re shivering.”
I give him a weak smile, but don’t try to deny it. “Where did you go?”
He holds up a pre-bottled protein shake, which is open with a bendy-straw sticking out of it. “You need some calories. You haven’t had anything real to eat in days.”
“That’s not real food,” I argue. My teeth are chattering now, and Hayden checks the temperature of the water before cursing and placing the protein shake bottle on the stool he was sitting on earlier and turns off the water, which is up to my nipples now.
I don’t question it as he starts to strip out of his clothes. Iamsurprised though when he walks over to the marble shower in the corner and sprays himself down, not bothering to wait for the water to heat up. The dirt and the soot on his face washes away, and he doesn’t even grab a towel before he leaves the shower and comes back over to the bath. He steps into the tub behind me, sitting down and pulling me against his chest so I’m sort of sitting sideways in his lap. “Now that I’m not about to dirty up your bathwater, let’s see if we can get some of this protein shake down, okay? Then we can wash your hair.”
“I was promised grapes,” I mutter, instantly feeling soothed by his body heat. Maybe my omega is still responding to his proximity even though the bond is cut off right now.
“Well, my queen,” he reaches behind him to grab the shake, “I can see if I can find you something grape-flavored later, but this is what West gave me to give to you. Doctor’s orders.”
He holds the straw up to my mouth, and hesitantly, I take a sip. I guess it’s nothorrible. Though I can’t help but wonder why the good doctor didn’t come in to give it to me himself. I guess Iamnaked, but if that was the only issue, wouldn’t Kole be in here too?
“I want you to know,” Hayden clears his throat suddenly as I drink, “I asked them to give me time with you. They would be in here otherwise.”
“Was I that obvious?” I laugh weakly.
“I could see the wheels turning after I mentioned West,” he admits, tightening his arm around me.
I continue to sip at the protein shake, my body slowly relaxing and becoming less shaky the longer I’m in contact with Hayden. There’s about half of the shake left when I push it away. “I can’t stomach any more than that.”
“That’s okay. We’ll try more later.” He puts the bottle back on the stool and then shifts me so I’m sitting between his legs. He uses his hands to re-wet my hair, then pumps shampoo out of the bottle sitting on the side of the tub. “I’ve never washed someone else's hair, Fireball,” he admits quietly as he starts to work it in. “You’re gonna have to tell me if I’m fucking it up.”
My heart seizes in my chest at his admission. “I’ve never had my hair washed by someone else.” My eyes flutter closed as his magical fingers start to massage my scalp. “But I can tell you right now, you’re not fuckin’ it up. In fact, I might never wash my own hair again. I’ll get y’all on a rotatin’ schedule.”
He chuckles, rinsing out the shampoo with the shower-head attachment, and a heady warmth envelopes me as the steamy water runs over my body. Is this what it feels like to be cherished? Is this what Mabel meant when she would talk about finding a pack?
It’s insane to realize that for the first time in five years…I feel safe. Treasured. Hayden’s masterful hands move to my shoulders and rub blissful circles as the conditioner sits, and his seemingly innocent touch makes me yearn to get closer.
This is different from anything else we’ve done. We’ve fucked, we’ve played, but this…intimacy is new.
I need more of it.
But…there’s something I have to say first.
“Hayden?” My voice is breathless as he starts to rinse out my hair again. It falls around my shoulders as he works the conditioner from the wet strands.
“Hmm?”
“I…” He needs to know how I feel about him, truly. He said the words to me before we bonded, and then we never talked about it again. “I love you.”
He freezes. “Jo…” he says, like he doesn’t quite believe me.
“I’m not just sayin’ it because you saved me, or because of our lost bond,” I add quickly, turning around and sitting on my knees. I take his face in my hands and wipe the single tear tracking down his cheek with my thumb. “I shoulda said it back when you told me the first time, ’cause I felt it then. But…I was afraid. I love you, Hayden. I love how you make me feel alive, and the way you laugh. Your heart is good, even if you like to hide under the crazy sometimes. We’re alike in that way. You…you’re an amazin’ man, Hayden, and an even better alpha. I love you so damn much it hurts.”
His face softens, his chin tilting as our lips meet in a sweet, gentle kiss.
