Leo is silent for longer. “Yeah.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah. I’m sorry. I guess I was kind of aware of it, but I’ve always just kind of… ignored it. Which is horrible. And a horrible big brother thing to do. Elias has done a much better job than I have.”
“One of the few times you actually didn’t ignore it was at dinner the other night.”
“With Mom and Dad?”
“And Elias.”
He nods curtly. “And Elias encouraged it.”
“There you go.”
“So what happened this weekend?”
I bury myself further into my nest. “I don’t know… that whole week…” For the nine hundredth time, I go over that week in my head. When it started going downhill. “I think something happened after you came over and…” I flush red.
Leo gives a full body cringe. “Did I almost catch you two together?”
I gargle nonsensically.
“Yuck,” he whispers.
“There were other things, too,” I say, quickly moving on. “He caught me having a weird conversation with Andrea. She said something about fuckboys not having a real job. And I know you and your dumbass friends are always giving him shit for that.”
He hums.
“And you wouldn’t get off him about sleeping his way across Manhattan. He wasn’t doing that. At least when he was with me.”
“Why are you still defending him?” Leo says suddenly. “After last weekend?”
“Even if it doesn’t work out between me and him… I don’t want you to lose your best friend. Elias is… he’s… if anything, he’s a really good friend,” I finish lamely.
Leo leans back on the couch, resting his head on the back. “I’m still glad I hit him.”
I think about it. “I am, too.”
“What are you going to do about your apartment?”
I shrug. “I don’t know. Stay here for a while and not deal with it?”
He sighs.
“I’ve used up all my Hot Girl energy. I’m all out. I just need a few days to recharge it. Maybe weeks. Can I do that from here?”
He mashes his palms into his face. “Fine.”
“But don’t bring your new girlfriend back here. I don’t want to hear you.”
“What the fuck?”
“You owe me for twenty-nine years of brotherly neglect.” I snuggle back into my Mourning Nest and try to rebuild.
I’m losing my kids.
Some are asleep. Some are acting out. All are unengaged.
