I turned to look at him, and I saw the film of moisture in his eyes.
I wasn’t sure if I should pretend I didn’t know and let him get it off his chest…or spare him the pain of sharing it.
He began. “A long time ago?—”
“Dad, I know about Vivian and Lena.”
He noticeably stiffened when I cut through his words, stopping him from having to break his heart unnecessarily. He turned to look at me, his eyes wide in shock as the film of moisture reflected the sunlight. His eyes shifted slightly back and forth between mine as he processed what I shared, that I already knew.
“I’m so sorry that you lost them both.”
His eyes stared into mine as they continued to water, confusion and grief all mixed together.
I hoped he wouldn’t ask how I knew. “Once I knew, it all made sense. Why you’d been pushing me so hard since I could remember. Why we sailed headfirst into the storm. Why my perfect swordsmanship was never good enough. Why you taught me how to hunt and fish and clean my kills, how to survive if there was ever a time when I only had myself.”
His eyes kept watering, the tears almost billowing over the lids.
“And now I feel terrible for leaving on that ship and sailing off for months, knowing how scared you must have been the entire time. If I’d known…” I shook my head. “I never would have gone. I never would have put you through that.”
His tears spilled over and dropped down his cheeks, two perfectly straight lines that moved to his hard jaw.
“I’m so sorry you lost your family, Dad.” My own eyes began to water, thinking about the misery he must have carried for decades before he’d found my mom…and found love again. “I’m so sorry.”
He took a breath and tried to stifle his tears, but when he closed his eyes, more tears broke free and streaked down his olive-tinted skin.
“And I’m honored to carry Lena with me in my middle name. To keep her alive and with us always.”
He looked down at the bench between us then reached for my hand. He grabbed it like a snake about to constrict its prey because he gripped me so hard. He stared at our joined hands as he tried to maintain his emotions in front of me, especially outside in the courtyard that was open to the guards and others. “Now you understand…what you mean to me.”
“I’ve always understood, Dad. Even before I knew.”
He bowed his head slightly as he took a breath. “My father and I had our differences, but he raised me into a man. I’d always wanted to be a father, to do the same with my children, and Vivian and I tried for a while before it happened for us.” He paused, his eyes still soaked and red. “I was soexcited…beyond words.” His voice cracked when he spoke, but he continued on.
I’d never seen my father this way, never felt this close to him.
“So when I lost them both…” He closed his eyes like he couldn’t bear to think about it. “I didn’t think I could go on. I tried not to, but Khazmuda fused with me to keep me alive. I hated him for that…for a long time.”
“Dad…” I squeezed his hand.
“It was over twenty years before I met your mother. Twenty years I spent in the different stages of grief. Irrevocably scarred by what I’d lost. I was an angry man who wanted to burn down the world so everyone would suffer the way I suffered. I took back the Southern Isles, not just for the dragons and my family, but because of what they took from me.” He drew in another deep breath. “The life that I should have had.” He stared at our joined hands for a while. “I found happiness with your mother, a love so deep and layered and true that it healed me. And then one day…we were blessed with you.”
He lifted his chin, a new wave of tears that he didn’t wipe away. “Boy or girl, I didn’t care. I was just grateful I had another chance at fatherhood. But when I saw you, you were exactly what I wanted. And I vowed I would love and protect you always.” He started to actually cry, reaching a wave of catharsis. “That I would never let anythingeverhappen to you.” The tears poured down his face as he grabbed my hand with his other one. “So I raised you like a man, the way my father raised me. Didn’t shield you from the world but toughened you for it. I’ve lived with the fear of losing yousince the moment you were born, and it’s a burden that only another parent would understand. But Callum made me realize…it’s time to let go.”
He looked at me again. “My job raising you is over. You’re a woman now, a woman who can protect herself, can think for herself, who has earned the love of a man who would die for her. You aren’t a helpless little girl who needs me. You’re Queen Lily Lena Rothschild.” His voice changed, his tears silenced as his voice deepened with pride. “You’re ferocious and fierce and smart and strong and brave—fucking powerful—everything I’ve ever wanted you to be.”
26
LILY
When I walked in the door, the villa had been cleaned, and a delicious aroma was coming from the kitchen. When Callum heard me enter the house, he emerged from the hallway slightly wet, like he’d just finished bathing. He was in just his black boxers and nothing else, a living tree that entered my living room.
His eyes found mine and stayed there for a second, reading the emotion instantly. “Xivin.” He made his way around the living room and the dining table and came to me by the doorway, feeling my emotions from across the room. His hands moved into my hair, and he cradled me as he looked into my face, knowing something was wrong and asking without actually questioning me.
“My father and I talked about Vivian and Lena.”
His eyes softened as he began to understand.
“I told him I already knew so he didn’t have to break his heart telling me, and he didn’t ask how I knew.”
