“If you had children, you would understand.” It was a cheap attack, but I meant it in that moment. “Until you have children, you don’t know what love is. Trust me, if you had your own, you would sacrifice the world for them the same way I would.”
“I wouldn’t.”
“You can’t say that.”
“If my husband were who they wanted, I wouldn’t hesitate.”
“Then you’re the coldest bitch who’s ever lived.”
She didn’t react to the harsh words I uttered. She maintained her refined expression and her eternal elegance, like the armor around her heart hadn’t been dented by my fired arrows. “If I were a cold bitch, I would have just told Lily the truth myself. Left her a note on her kitchen counter and none would be the wiser. But I came to you and looked you in the face like a man. I love Lily like my own?—”
“Fuck you for saying that?—”
She continued on as if I hadn’t interrupted her. “But she made her choice to take Callum’s place and caused all this. She’sstrong and smart and honorable, and if she knew she was the reason all of us were in peril, she would want to face the consequences of her actions—like an adult. But you shelter her like a child, Talon. You keep her in the dark like she’s unable to handle the truth, when she’s handled so much on her own without you. She was willing to sacrifice you to win the war, and you were proud. How is this any different?”
I shook my head as I felt the blood pump in my face. “It’s completely different.”
She was the one who had the audacity to look at me like I was in the wrong. “I will keep your secret because you asked me to take it to the grave. I will honor my word to you. But if Lily ever knew that you kept this from her, she would never forgive you.”
“And I will never forgive you for what you’ve said to me.” I rose to my feet and gave her the most venomous look I’d ever given to anyone. “If you’re lucky enough to have your own children someday, you will understand why.”
21
LILY
I sat on the bench in the courtyard away from my villa, the part of the courtyard that faced Callum’s vineyard. His home was too far away from me to see with the naked eye, but I knew it was there, a dot on the green horizon.
I didn’t know if he was working on his vineyard making wine or if that felt pointless now with the battle about to ensue.
I knew Zehemoth felt my sadness because he flew from the wildlands, over the hills and valleys, and then headed toward me at the top of the cliff. He came in for a gentle landing beside me then crept close before he lay down on the stone floor, his head and neck fitting between two potted olive trees.
He didn’t ask if I was okay. Didn’t ask what I was doing.
Just seemed to know.
It made me realize how close we’d gotten because we’d reached that level of familiarity where we just knew what theother felt and why they felt that way. His eyes would shift to me to examine my face before he looked at the hills in the distance. “I haven’t opened the bottle of wine he gave me.”
You think it’s bad?
“No,” I said quickly and with a pained laugh. “I just…it’s all I have of him now.”
You have your memories. And as long as you have those, you’ll always have him.
“Memories fade.”
Not if you don’t let them. I still remember you when you were far younger than you are now. And I remember you at every age.
“Because dragons retain memories differently than we do.”
Yes, but also because those moments meant something to me, so I made sure to keep them forever.
“That’s sweet, Zehemoth.”
His eyes looked at me.I love you,Sunieth.
“I love you too.”
We returned to our comfortable silence, my heart still a mound of broken shards in my chest. “I feel like this is all happening because of me.”
