When my body takes over,
my brain goes blurry,
and my heart checks out,
leaves Earth,
rocketships to the moon,
races with the asteroids.
When Little Death slides in,
sinking its fangs into me.
But Little Death’s nowhere to be found,
abandoning me when I need it most.
All I have left is an ugly ache crawling up from my chest.
I squeeze my eyes shut,
fist clenched tighter to fight it,
to crush it before it breaks out,
to reach for numb,
but onlyhurtgrabs my hand.
Then a memory crashes through?—
“What’s your name?”
“Jesus. Sorry. Uh… Andrew. I think—you?”
“Allison.”
“Allison…
“Wanna come up here with me?”
Romeo’s hands slow. His breath pulls back.
And when he scans my face,
he doesn’t know what he’s seeing.
He only knows that something's wrong.
He tries to keep going, cupping my face with one more roll of his thumb against my clit, kissing me slower now, hoping I’ll come back to him.
But I don’t kiss back.
I breathe hard through my nose,
trying not to cry.
