“NAHHHH. THAT SHIT WORKED?”
I laugh again,
running a hand through my hair because
what the hell else am I supposed to do with all this adrenaline?
Cry? Throw up? Pass out?
Celie shrieks like she’s front row at a concert.
“Okay but like… when you said you were gonna rap, I thought we were talkin’ a lil flow, a lil flex.Notyou rippin’ open your chest and droppin’ your heart in his inbox likesurprise, here’s all my damage.And now he wants to MEET TONIGHT?!”
I’m grinning so hard my face hurts,
my phone smashed against my ear.
I'm a pacing lunatic by the pool,
heart kicking her feet.
I don’t know why when he’s the one who walked out and left me there.
So I shrug, though she can’t see me.
Because words? Gone.
I used them all on the damn rap.
“Yo—he rhymed back?—
“HEY! WALK, ASSHOLE?—
but what does this allmean?”
I hear the city behind her?—
horns, life, movement.
She’s on the street and still invested.
“I don’t know,” I say.
Maybe he needs closure. An ending.
The last nail in the coffin to bury me.
Maybe he's got one more thing to say.
His final stitch in the goodbye.
But my heart’s delusional, already sprinting, torch in hand, lighting up every feeling and fantasy with him I swore I buried.
And I’m letting her have her moment,
letting her touch a life of us together,
before I burn the whole place down again.
