“So, gotta look out for myself, y’know?
“If nothin’ stays, then nothin’ can leave.
“And shit’s beenfine.”
Until you—fucking you?—
showed up and spun me dizzy.
Now I can’t tell which way’s which anymore.
My hand lifts like—the fuck’m I supposed to do?
“Yeah, guess we’re doin’ this now.
“Talkin’ about Type. About me walkin’ out.”
If I don’t let it out,
it’s gonna rip me open from the inside.
His hand drops from my waist,
runs through his hair,
hooks the back of his neck,
his eyes on me, nervous.
“Andrew, I get hit on like it’s my second job.”
My hand's already talking,
New York in my veins.
“Not sayin’ that to be some cocky bitch, alright? Not bragging—wish they fuckin’ wouldn’t. Drives me nuts. And honestly? No clue what it is about me or why.”
God, listen to me,
sounding like one of those girls I can’t stand.
Oh no, poor me, everybody wants me.
“But I say no every time. So when I say I don’t do this? I mean I’veneverfuckin’ done this.”
I start counting on my fingers?—
“Never been on a date.
“Never give guys the time of day.
“Never kiss.
“Never jerk ‘em off.”
My hands fall,
and I bite the inside of my cheek.
