“Hey.” Adora tugged on my shirt. “What’s happening?”
Beck reached into his coat and pulled out the straws.
He kept them locked in his fist, extending them to the middle of the circle.
“Wait a second,” Adora said, confused. “I don’t know what’s happening.”
The Heathens remained quiet, and Beck looked at Phoenix first.
“Stone, what’s happening?” Adora begged behind me, clutching my sides. The winter howl drowned out her voice, but I could still hear her every word, and it was tearing me apart.
“It’s okay,” I told her, throwing an arm behind me to comfort her as Phoenix shook out his hand and blew out air between his cheeks.
“Okay,” he said, shifting in place.
Then he drew the first straw.
He was safe.
His chest caved as he let out a long exhale.
That was when Adora understood what was happening.
She shoved her hands into my back. I jerked forward but didn’t stumble. Keeping my back to her, I bit the inside of my cheek to control myself and keep still as she continued to slap my arms and shove her palms into my shoulders, my back, my arms. “Stop!” she cried, hitting me over and over again. “Please, Stone. Stop!”
Zephyr was next.
To my right, his green orbs found mine as he drew a straw. Like he needed me for strength. Our gazes left each other and crawled to the straw in his hand. He was safe.
Beck shifted his fist in my direction.
It was my turn, and Adora gripped my arm, yanking on me, trying to turn me around. She was cursing and crying, and I was trying so hard to keep it together.Stone not paper, I chanted, balling my fist, finding the will to get through this.
I lifted my eyes to Julian who was standing across from me.
I was praying to the gods that it would be him.
He was praying to the gods that it would be me.
We were both thinking the same thing.
Behind him, Fallon stood, only half of her face visible. But she stood silent, and from what I could see of her face, I saw no worry. Julian had to have told her whatever she needed to hear to make her this calm, confident. He could have promised it wouldn’t be him, and perhaps he even had a way to make sure this was true.
I reached out, my hand hovering over the white straws in the darkness as each one of Adora’s cries was a blow to my chest. And when I pinched a straw, Julian blinked. A quick intake of breath.
I moved to another, watching his expression.
His eyes were like two daggers cutting into my mind.
My eyes closed, and I drew a straw from Beck’s fist.
Seconds suspended there.
Adora’s cry shattered me into a million pieces before I found the nerve to open my eyes. From her reaction, I already knew, and I hung my head.What have you done?I asked myself, feeling Zephyr’s hand come over my shoulder.
When I opened my eyes again, the night was blurry.
Julian was already turned away from me and hugging Fallon, smiles on their faces. And again, he had it all. He would have a lifetime with her, and I fucking hated him.
