In town, their demeanor transformed. Relaxed to uncomfortable.
In town, they’d never let anyone look at their faces for long. I couldn’t decide if it was a habit or an insecurity about the way they looked or how others saw them. They often hid under hoods, behind coat collars, and if nothing else, behind their hands or fingers. They were forced to pretend to be hardy, resolute Heathens whose strength and confidence far outweighed their feelings in front of the Order and Sacred Sea. Then, in public, it seemed, they still wore masks, even when they no longer needed to.
However, when the five of us were alone at the Goody Estate, they felt at ease, as though they could breathe. Like the way Adora made me feel.
Phoenix set his black coffee on the table, his gold eyes amused. “So, Romeo. Are we going to talk about where you always sneak off to in the middle of the night?”
I wiped my bottom lip with the pad of my thumb. “My indiscretions do not concern you in the slightest.”
Julian raised a brow. “Isn’t she living with Cyrus now?”
“The more one says you can’t have it, the more you crave it.”
He shook a sugar packet, an appalled grin stretching across his face. “You must have a death wish.”
“Yes, I’ve been told this once before.”
Beck lifted his chin. “Are you in love with her or something?”
All three pairs of eyes were on me.
“Or something,” I replied. “She’s all I can think about. When I’m not with her, it feels like a hammer is constantly crushing the bones in my chest.” I scanned the table, seeing all their faces twisted with amusement. “What?”
“Yeah, you’re fucked.” Phoenix laughed. “You’ve fallen in love, and you don’t even know it. And with a Sullivan?” he added, pressing a palm to his chest. “Talk about the brutality of self-inflicted pain.”
“It’s not love. It’s obsession,” I corrected him.
Phoenix shrugged, bringing the coffee to his mouth. “I call it love. You call it obsession. It’s all the same.”
I leaned over, tapping a finger on the table to get his attention. “I’ve spent twenty-four years alone with my head hot in a sack and my cock cold in my trousers, close to zero human interaction. She’s the only girl who’s shown me an ounce of attention. It’s obsession, not love,” I repeated, falling back into the booth. “I could never love someone who wouldn’t choose me.”
Phoenix nodded. “Good, don’t see her again,” he said, all humor leaving the table. Like they’d been testing me this entire time. “You saw what happened to me. There are plenty of girls in Norse Woods at your disposal. You want Cleo or another flatlander? Fine, but not Sacred Sea, man. It’s not worth getting your skull crushed in or burned to ash over.”
“All right, moving on,” Julian interrupted. “Last night, while Romeo here was fraternizing with the enemy”—I closed my eyes and shook my head—“Zeph and I were brainstorming, and I think we may have a way we can communicate with the Shadows.”
“Speak of the devil,” Beck muttered, looking toward the front entrance.
My attention followed until it slammed into Adora.
She was standing by the door, tiny braids in her long blonde hair, wrapped in a fur coat, and the fool’s arm disappearing beneath it. He was standing close, too close, his mouth pressed against her ear. And she was smiling.
“Dammit,” Julian whispered, and I could feel him watching me from the corner of his eye. But then the insignificant fool leaned down and kissed the corner of her perfect mouth.
Suddenly, I felt sick.
Suddenly, something was burning under my skin.
Suddenly, my fingers were stretching and closing into fists.
“Don’t do anything stupid,” Phoenix hissed. “There are too many people here.”
My blood boiled, and their voices fell behind the sound of my pulse beating in my ears.“Romeo.” “Danvers.” “Stone.”Then my mind was provoking me, making me see things that couldn’t be real.The room spins in a swirl of amused faces caught in a frenzy of sordid eyes and sardonic laughter. And their laughter doesn’t stop. Their laughter only grows louder and louder, fingers pointing down at my table—the one I’m sitting at. I look down to where they’re pointing, seeing my slaughtered heart lay, dismembered and crying and bleeding before me. “Looks like someone forgot to take their heart off the table,” Adora says with an artful smile, sliding into the booth across from me. Then she withdraws her dagger and stabs my heart, blood squirting across my cheek. “Let’s eat.”
And then air was sucked from the room.
I snatched up my coat just as Phoenix leaned over and snatched me up by my shirt at my chest. “Use your fucking brain,” he said through clenched teeth.
I ripped myself from his grasp and stalked toward the door, my vision in a fog. I didn’t stop until I blew past the charming couple and my palms hit the exit, shoving the door open. Cold air rushed into my face, and I threw my hands on top of my head, trying to find oxygen. I walked to the side of the diner and pinned my back against the brick.
