Then his bottom lip trembled, his muscles seeming to jump under his skin. Like he wasn’t sure whether to run to me or stay back and control himself because looking at me was tearing him apart, too. He wet his lip to hide it, then turned his back to me, hanging his head and folding his fingers behind his neck.
“How dare you come here and make jokes when I can barely hold it together,” I shouted, not caring if it pierced through the walls. “After everything, how are you okay right now?!”
Stone swung around and stalked in my direction.
His eyes were bloodshot and miserable as he closed in on me.
“Do I lookokayto you, Adora?” he asked, stopping inches from my face, stabbing his chest with his finger. “Look at me. I’m a rotten mess!”
And then his scent surrounded me.
Just like hearth smoke, winter air, and mistletoe.
I needed to get away. So it didn’t hurt anymore.
So he couldn’t see what he was doing to me.
I stepped to my right, and Stone grabbed my elbows.
“Adora, stop,” he said, walking me backward until my spine hit the wall. He pinned me there with his hips so I couldn’t move.
But I can’t stop. I can’t breathe.
I tried to escape before I broke, but it was useless. Another wave of sobs broke through me, and I covered my face to stow away all the things I didn’t want him to see. The same truth I’d tried so hard to bury.
Stone grabbed my wrists and pried my hands from my face.
He clutched them tightly in his hands, his dark gaze tracing a path across my features until his eyes landed on mine.
And at this moment, he could see that I was not only the angry daughter motivated by vengeance, or the mermaid who refused to drown in her tears, or the tough woman who put on a brave face each time her heart was raped by injury, or the seamstress who did her best to hold her family together, or the villain who hid her hurt with pain, or the girl who lived in a fairytale because it was easier to tell stories on occasions when reality proved to be too difficult. At this moment, he could see the truth. I was a girl in love with a Heathen.
And my stomach twisted into knots, utterly repulsed with myself.
Why must my heart be a sadistic nutcase.
Here, Stone,it screamed from my chest.Here’s the one thing to completely destroy me.
“How did this happen to us?” he asked, his voice crestfallen as he lowered himself, holding my gaze. He swiped hair from my wet cheeks and smoothed it down and behind my ears. He then took my head into his hands, propping his thumbs under my jaw, so I had no choice but to look at him. “I never imagined being another thing you wanted to escape from.”
With my fists clenched at my sides, I froze—fighting my feelings, resisting them. I squeezed them so hard that my nails sank into my palms, breaking open the scabs.
“Adora,” he said as he cleaned mascara from under my eyes with his thumbs.Gentle, gentle.“I have spent my entire life convincing myself that I am not a monster. Please, do not make me have to convince you, too.”
Warm blood slipped inside my closed fist, and my lips trembled. “You are a monster.”
His brows pulled together. “You don’t mean that.”
“I want you to leave!”
He shook his head. “I’m not leaving.”
I pushed his shoulders and slapped his chest, smearing my blood from my palms across his shirt, forearms, and neck. Stone didn’t move. He closed his eyes, claiming the spot with his arms hanging at his sides. When nothing else worked, I screamed.
Then he grabbed me, yanked me to his chest, and slapped his hand over my mouth, breaking my scream in half. He smashed his forehead into mine.
“Stop,” he gritted through his clenched teeth, hurt wrapped around his voice. He flexed his jaw, pressing his palm flat against my lips, his eyes sliding between mine. “You’re being pathetic right now. I would never hurt you.”
I wriggled from his hand and drove my palms into his chest.
