stripping my breath,
cheatingthe odds,
stealingmy heart,
and I don’t mind.”
—Oliver Masters
mia.
IT TOOK A LITTLE OVER TWO WEEKS to find our rhythm after the death of Chad, a boy I’d never known personally. Ollie hadn’t known him well either, but he explained the impact of Chad’s death on him. He’d said seeing Chad hit him like an atomic bomb of one hundred grieving people. Even Chad himself, feeling the emotions of his last moments closing in on him, and Ollie’s heart unable to contain it. I didn’t fully understand it myself, but the look in his eyes was that of a million broken hearts. The single moment had utterly drained him, and for a week Ollie ran on empty. It had been heart-wrenching to witness, how someone else’s pain could physically affect him in the way it did.
It was a cold mid-November afternoon, and I sat in Conway’s office wrapped in Ollie’s oversized hoodie. His familiar scent fought against the bitter winter and Conway’s unwanted opinion.
“You are capable of so much more than to skip out on college,” Dr. Conway said through a shake of her head, and spun in her chair to face her desk. My teeth sunk into the plastic end of the hoodie string and I rolled my eyes. “You’re a genius. And you’re throwing it all away. Why?”
“I don’t have to explain myself,” I mumbled, annoyed with the conversation. My head was overflowing with current events—the prankster, Bruce, Ollie, Ethan—leaving no room to think about the future. At one point, I was sure I’d been destined to help victims of sexual assault, but the prankster had taken that away from me the second he revealed my journal and showed everyone I couldn’t be trusted. Maybe I was never cut out for it.
Empathy had never been my strong suit, so perhaps he did me a favor.
Conway narrowed her eyes, reading my body language because she couldn’t understand the words coming out of my mouth. “Do me a favor, Mia. Take a walk around campus tomorrow. By yourself. Fresh air and no distraction. Give your future an hour of your time to think this through before you make drastic decisions. It deserves that much, okay?”
The string fell from my mouth. “Okay.”
Sales trickone-oh-one: leave the question ending in “okay,” “alright,” or “sounds good,” and nine times out of ten your audience would reply with a positive response, automatically agreeing to whatever they said without thinking it through. A trick of the mind.
She got me.
Fuck.
I quickly came to terms with it and stood from the couch.
“See you next week,” Conway said through a knowing smile as I headed for the door. “Oh, and Mia?” Resting my palm over the door frame, I turned to face her. “I still cook for Thanksgiving. I’ll bring leftovers, and we can have a mini Thanksgiving during our session Thanksgiving Day, sound good?”
“Sounds good.”
Shit. She got me again.
I chuckled to myself. “You’re good, Dr. Conway,” I called out while walking away.
“I know,” she reminded me from behind.
It was difficult to dislike Dr. Conway. Since day one, she’d grown on me. Even when I’d thought I doubted her and couldn’t trust her, she’d proved she truly cared, being the only acting parental figure who pushed my limits and had been there every step of the way. I was going to miss her.
On my way back to fourth wing, Jake, Tyler, and Bria blew past me with cringed features. Well, except for Jake, that is. His eyes betrayed his disgusted expression, and I knew he missed me. But around Tyler and Bria, he wouldn’t dare defy his loyalty. I had to get him alone and talk to him.
I knocked on Ollie’s door before opening and found him asleep in his bed with a book sprawled out over his stomach. Gently, I lifted the book and set it aside before melting beside him. Ollie hummed, wrapping his arms around me, burrowing his head into my neck.
I dove my hand under his shirt and trailed my fingers over the surface of his warm skin.
“Conway give you the third degree again?” he asked, his breath brushing my neck.
Goosebumps flared, and I leaned into him with a small laugh. “Always.”
“She’s right, you know … ”—His arm pulled me closer— “You can become anything you want, and you choose to do nothing. It’s a waste if you ask me.”
“Wonderful. You too?”
