Though, tonight was different.
Tonight, was the first night he had ever climbed in beside me. I wanted it to be Ollie next to me, but having Ethan did lessen the blow—a little. The tears still came as the memories preyed on me, weakening me. I clenched my eyes, and the visions emerged as my cries drifted into the night.
I was held captive by the love Ollie gave, and the future he built for us. But the day Ollie slipped away, I shattered. For seven months, I was left behind picking up the pieces.
And Ethan was on his knees, helping me.
I’d never asked him to, either. Though here he was, holding me as I broke away all the pieces he just picked up the night before—a recurring nightmare.
There was little Ethan knew about Ollie, only the fact he was Oscar’s brother who had been arrested for drugging Bria and myself and almost raped me. The first night I’d cried out for Ollie in my sleep, Ethan asked me why it was his name I screamed out for. Ethan couldn’t understand, and he never would.
Talking about Ollie only hurt more, so I avoided all unnecessary self-infliction.
Ethan’s fingers ran down my arms, giving my body silent permission to fill my lungs completely. “He’s gone, Mia,” he said in my hair with confidence. His arm reached under my arm, crossing over my chest, pinning me to his as if I couldn’t be close enough. “I’ll stay until you fall back asleep.”
After day bled into night, it became impossible to hide. Ollie wasn’t here to get me through it, and I was angry. Ollie had taught me how to save myself, but this time, I was drowning, and I didn’t have the strength to swim against the current of the pain.
But, Ethan kept my head above water.
At least when I closed my eyes, I could pretend it was Ollie.
And I was desperate.
Chapter Three
“What’s keeping me up at night
is the haunting memory ofthat last
breath you took right in front of me.”
—Oliver Masters
ollie.
“CAN WE AT LEAST stop for tea? I’m in need of a caffeine fix,” I asked, all-knowing the answer, but this drive dragged. Plus, my restless legs needed stretching from the three-hour transport from the jail.
The security guard didn’t bother entertaining my request, keeping his focus out the window of the small van. I didn’t remember him. He was dark-skinned with a shiny bald head and slim physique. The restraints pinged against the metal as I attempted to lean my elbows over my knees to steady my bouncing knee. I groaned and threw my head back against the torn leather. “You must be new at Dolor, yeah?” I asked, slicing the awkward silence. “Haven’t seen you before. What building are you stationed?”
“We have another hour until we get there. Let’s make the next hour relaxing for both of us, alright?”
Turning my head out the window, I wondered what could be waiting for me at Dolor. Maybe jail wasn’t so bad. Aside from being thrown into interrogation on numerous occasions for hours on end, I’d been treated fairly. It took five months for the detectives to put together a strong case against my brother, Oscar. At first, I hadn’t been cooperative, but only because I’d been angry … and I honestly didn’t know much. My brother wasn’t verbal with his indecencies. I could only confirm what I knew, which was the history of my mum, the names of the punters who came in and out of our childhood home, and what happened at Dolor.
After the second week without my medication, I had completely lost control as my emotions raided me from all directions.
The only thing I could think about was her.
All I asked for was her.
All I wanted and needed was her.
Regardless of whether my eyes were opened or closed, she invaded every piece of me like a raging storm. To get me under control, they had reached out to Dolor and retrieved my medical paperwork before putting me right back on the agony-reducing pills, and finally, they had me right where they wanted me.
Oscar had gotten what he deserved. And me? I had been cleared from all sex crimes. I’d never been associated with the prostitution ring, only a product of a prostitute.
Unfortunately, they couldn’t clear me from the original crime I’d been placed at Dolor for originally. Even after explaining to the detectives I was innocent for the crime against Brad, the punter that had been on life support by the hands of my brother when I was seventeen, they still didn’t have enough evidence confirming it was Oscar.
Oscar had a false alibi. I hadn’t.
