“So why are you out here?” Cole asks with a frown.
I groan. “That’s not—”
“Freya!” Bonnie’s voice cuts off my protest, and she appears at the back door right as Cole steps aside to clear the doorway. She embraces Freya warmly, her smile wide. “I thought you weren’t coming until tomorrow!”
“Yes,” Freya says, “well, when I discovered that Derek had come back to the living, we changed our plans.”
“Does Liam know you’re already here?”
“He knows!” Liam shouts from inside. “Bonnie, you’re in my way. I need my birthday hug!”
A curse slips off my tongue when Liam bounces onto the patio and picks Freya up in an exuberant hug, and I’m tempted to text my security guard, Bruce, to ask him why he didn’t warn me that my house was being invaded. But then I realize my phone is who knows where inside, and I can’t help but chuckle.
I never used to be without it, and now it’s hard to remember it exists.
“What’s so funny?” Cole asks.
Suddenly all four of them are looking at me, and it takes all my self-control not to take an anxious step back. They are…intimidating. They’ve always been impressive, even before fame found them, but I’ve never had them all so focused on me like this. There was always something to keep the attention away from me so they wouldn’t look too closely and see the cracks in my facade.
Taking a slow breath, I slide my hands into my pockets and lift my mouth in a small smile. “Nothing,” I murmur and drink in the sight of them, noting as many details as I can so I don’t forget this moment.
Liam has grown up in the four and a half years that I’ve known him. At twenty-three, he was so unsure of himself when we met. He still looks the same—messy blond hair, t-shirt and shorts, mischief in his blue eyes—but there’s a confidence and maturity about him now. He’s learned to face his fame with resilience and focus on what really matters to him, and my heart throbs to know I still make that list.
And Bonnie… She looks so much stronger than when we were in our first movie together five years ago, and I love the way she doesn’t try to hide. She has always been kind, but that used to be seen as submission, and it killed me every time she let people think less of her than they should. Now, she knows her worth, and she isn’t afraid to stand up for others as well as herself, shining brilliantly.
Cole looks older than he ever has—he has a baby who keeps him up at night and a team to run during the day—but somehow he also looks softer. He has always fiercely guarded his heart, but his capacity for love keeps growing the more he lets people in. Words can never express how grateful I am that he never shut me out, even when I kept so much from him. He was the closest thing I had to a brother before I met Elliot, and maybe someday I’ll be able to tell him how badly I needed his friendship a decade ago. He’s going to make an incredible father with the way he loves and protects, and I have so much to learn from him when it comes to trust and vulnerability.
Freya stands as tall as she ever has, proud and confident as a queen should be. But she also gazes back at me with love and empathy, like she knows exactly how hard it is to admit faults and failings, and I can’t help but wonder how much stronger we both could have been if we’d been less stubborn. Sure, she’s running a country, while I spend my time making faces and saying someone else’s words, but she and I have always been similar. So quick to offer advice and solutions but slow to let our friends do the same for us.
My chest grows tight, but it’s not anxiety pulling me into a spiral over the countless mistakes I’ve made over the years. It’s gratitude and humility and overwhelming love for these friends of mine. For the people who have stood by me through thick and thin.For my family.
“Whoa,” Liam says, “am I seeing things, or is Derek crying?”
“Of course I’m crying,” I murmur and shake my head in exasperation. Then I step forward and pull Liam into a hug that surprises him so much that he stands stiff. I don’t blame him; it’s rare for me to initiate affection like this. I shut my eyes tight as my emotions start to overwhelm me. “I almost walked away from you. From this.”
Freya scoffs. “Do you think we would have let you? Eventually we would have come to find you and save you from yourself.”
Liam finally returns my hug with an awkward pat on my back, clearly still thrown by my actions. “Peach is right. You can’t get rid of us that easily.”
Bonnie puts her hand on my arm. “We are always going to be there for you, Derek.”
“You’re stuck with us,” Cole adds.
Since I was six years old, I wanted nothing more than to go back to when I had a happy, functional family, and I hate that it took me so long to realize I’d found a new one years ago. “Can you forgive me for thinking that staying away was the best thing for you?” I ask all four of them at once, releasing Liam and taking a step back. I look at each in turn, making sure none of my habitual masks are in place.
I want them to see everything.
“Duh,” Liam says, punching me in the arm, and now he’s crying too.
“I am insulted that you need to ask,” Freya says in full seriousness and puts a hand on her hip.
Bonnie gives me a warm smile, much friendlier than the other two. “We all make mistakes, Derek. You should know more than anyone that true friends will be there for you no matter what.”
“And family sticks together,” Cole says quietly, his eyes on the ground.
“Except when they’re a piece of work like our good-for-nothing mother.” Elliot appears at the back door, folding his arms as he leans against the frame and meets my gaze with a sharpness in his eyes. “I almost feel bad for that husband of hers.” He reads something in my expression and chuckles. “But not that much.Hot Scoopis going to be a lot more careful about what they say from here on out.”
I’m not sure I want to know what happened with his phone call, but I’m grateful for his support.
