And again.
And again. Until his face caves in and my hands are soaked in red up to the wrist and his body goes limp beneath me and the only sound is my own ragged breathing.
Then, at last, it’s over.
I stare down at what’s left of his face—pulped meat where features used to be—and feel nothing but a vast, yawning emptiness where my wrath used to live.
Behind me, Eliana is crying. Small, hiccupping sobs that cave in my heart like I just caved in that motherfucker’s face.
I look at my hands. They’re shaking. Covered in blood that’s already going tacky in the air-conditioned chill.
I did this. Again.
The exam room looks like a crime scene—which, I suppose, it is now. Blood on the walls. Blood on the floor. Ultrasound photos soaking in spreading crimson pools. The lights shine overhead with cheerful indifference.
I should move. I have to get us out of here before someone calls the cops or Aleksei’s backup arrives. Before this becomes an even bigger clusterfuck than it already is.
But I can’t seem to make my body cooperate. I’m frozen over this dead man’s corpse, hands dripping, chest heaving.
“Bastian.”
Eliana’s voice reaches me like it’s traveling through water. Distant. Muffled.
“Bastian, please.”
I turn my head. She’s still huddled against the exam table, paper gown still sagging off one shoulder, arms still wrapped around her belly.
““I fuckingtoldyou not to come alone,” I hear myself say in a dead voice.
She flinches like I’ve slapped her.
“What did I say, Eliana?” I rise from the corpse, blood dripping from my knuckles onto the tile. “What did I specifically fucking say about going places without protection?”
“I—”
I laugh in ironic disgust. “You never fucking listen. You’re so goddamn determined to prove you don’t need anyone, and look where that got you.” I gesture at the destroyed exam room. “If I hadn’t followed you… If I’d actually respected your precious boundaries like you asked… You’d be dead. And our baby would be dead right along with you.”
I watch her face crumple. More tears spill faster down her cheeks. I know I should stop; I’m only making this worse. But the terror that’s been choking me since I saw that man’s silhouette disappear into this building has curdled into something uglier, and now that it’s here, I can’t seem to bottle it back up.
“You think Iwantedto be right?” I spit. “Do you think I enjoy being the paranoid asshole who can’t let you out of his sight for five fucking minutes?”
Eliana shakes her head, but whether she’s disagreeing with me or just trying to process, I can’t tell.
“I followed you because I knew, I fuckingknew,that something like this would happen eventually. Aleksei doesn’t forget. Aleksei doesn’t forgive. And you—” I drag a bloody hand through my hair, leaving rusty streaks across my forehead. “You walked right into his crosshairs because you were too stubborn to let me drive you to a goddamn doctor’s appointment.”
“I didn’t know,” she whispers.
“That’s the fucking point!” I’m shouting now. I can’t help it. “You didn’t know because you refused to let me close enough to protect you!”
“I’m sorry,” she mumbles into her lap.
“I can’t lose you,” I grit out. “Do you understand that? Ican’t fucking lose you, Eliana. You’re the only good thing I’ve ever had, and you keep trying to walk away from me. Why can’t you see that I just want to keep you safe?”
I reach down and grab her arm, hauling her up from the floor. She stumbles against me, and I catch her, steadying her with hands that are still slick with blood.
“We’re leaving. Now.”
I don’t wait for her to argue. I strip off my jacket and wrap it around her shoulders, covering the ruined gown, then grab her stick from where it fell and press it into her hand. My arm locks around her waist as I steer us toward the door, past the nurses frozen in the hallway and the receptionist who’s already on the phone with what I assume are the cops.
