“So, do you want to eat in silence or do you want to work on those ground rules you mentioned needing?” Beck asks, holding out a fork.
I take it with the click of my tongue. “I can’t believe this is actually happening…but after yesterday, it seems it would be smart for us to talk about thistemporaryarrangement.”
The corner of Beck’s mouth turns up before he takes a bite of his breakfast. As he chews he rolls his hand for me to continue on.
Hell, I guess I do somewhat have to lead this, don’t I?
“Okay, well, I’ll just be here while I look for a new place. I can pay?—”
Beck cuts me off with his best imitation of the Taboo buzzer. “Wrong. I don’t need or want your money.”
“Beck—”
He cuts me off again. “My first ground rule is that you quit suggesting to give me money. If this were Callie or Lucie, I’d do the exact same thing.”
My mouth opens then closes. I guess I hadn’t thought of it like that. I kind of hate thinking of it that way, actually. I love Callie and Lucie, and frankly, if their men weren’t around, I would expect Beck to do this. But that stupid girlish crush I have on him really only wants me to believe he’s doing this for me because I’m special.
Ay, I’m hopeless.
“I guess you’re right.” I sigh. “If you don’t want my money, I can make my peace with that…but no freeloader jokes. I offered to pay and you declined—that’s on you now.”
Beck chuckles. “Fair. What else you got?”
I’m not entirely sure. I threw out this idea of ground rules when he was flirting with me yesterday, but then Miles said something about friends with benefits as we were leaving.
Yesterday most definitely was a day I’d like to soon forget, but those three words have been sitting in the back of my mind. It had to have come from whatever conversation Dex and Beck were having, but did Dex suggest friends with benefits…or Beck?
I must sit in my ruminating silence a little too long because Beck starts again. “Look, we don’t have to make this a big deal. Let’s just agree that ground rule number two is to be adults about this. If I do something that pisses you off, then tell me.”
“Telling you has never stopped you before.”
Beck gives me that smirk of his. “We’ve never lived together before.”
Dammit, those are words I never thought I’d hear coming from Beck—don’t hate them—didn’t need to hear them. “I guess you’re right. We’re…roommates.”
The word hangs with thick tension in the air. Even though it’s temporary, all of whatever this is between us feels heavy. I don’t know why I said it like that, but with the phrase “friends with benefits” in the back of my mind, and all the pushback I’ve given him over the past few months—I don’t know, roommates feels like the first firm definition of our relationship that I can put out there.
We’re not exactly friends, definitely not enemies, and acquaintances feels wrong when it’s clear we both want to sleep with each other—at the very least. Or, well, it’s clear to me that the attraction is mutual, but the degree of it is not.
I like him, but I also don’t want to have to change for him either. That’s what my last boyfriend wanted out of me—change—and I refuse to go through that again. Part of me knows Beck isn’t like my ex, but according to my plans I’m on a relationship hiatus anyway.
It’s not for not knowing who I am or trying to be alone. I simply just want to be a single girl in her twenties.
I cut my cinnamon roll with my fork as I continue to think. Beck’s made his interest known and with me now living here…putting it on the table might actually solidify our terminology from roommates to friends and I can get over this crush faster…or get under it with no strings.
Stabbing my fork into my first bite, I nearly choose to stuff my mouth to keep the words from coming out, but then I drop my fork. “Beck…I don’t know if this qualifies as a ground rule, or just something I think I need to put out there. It’s probably going to make me sound absolutely crazy and random…” I hate this. I hate this. “One thing I don’t think I’ve really said before is that I don’t want that traditional, cookie-cutter lifestyle. I’mnot looking for a relationship right now. I don’t want to ever be pregnant or put my career second to a man’s. That’s not me, and it will never be me.”
Beck studies me and I feel like I want to crawl out of my skin. Deafening silence hangs for two whole seconds before Beck speaks. “Jensen, I?—”
Whatever words were going to come out of Beck’s mouth get cut off by someone banging on the door, sending Dottie into a barking fit which leads to the clatter of Beck’s fork as he drops it from his small jump-scare.
“Beck, open up!” Callie yells through the closed door. “I hate the cold!”
Another knock comes, then I hear Lucie. “Jensen, we know you’re still here.”
They can’t be serious. They actually could not have come at a worse time—what the hell?
Beck mumbles curses and small threats as he walks to the door. He barely gets the handle turned before Callie, Lucie, Reagan, and Emma come barreling into his apartment.
