Which it isn’t, of course.
‘Added to that,’ Blake continues, regardless, ‘everyone’s just waiting for the news to break that the three of you,’ he raises his hand, gesturing at first Nick, then Felix, then me, ‘have come to blows and walked away. And as for you,’ he turns to Emma, ‘youneed to convince everyone that you’re up to this. Ana might have talked the studio around for now, but we all know these things can turn on a dime.’
‘But I am up to this,’ Emma says, with unveiled irritation, for which I really don’t blame her.
‘Blake,’ I say, ‘she has, quite literally,beenup to this.’
‘People need to see that though.’
‘The Screenpublished that photo of us … ’
‘We need to show them more.’
‘What?’ asks Emma.
‘Lunch,’ he says. ‘I’ve booked you all in today at The Heaton Arms. Robbie’s old house.’
‘I don’t want to do that,’ I say, for a hundred reasons, not least that I still haven’t actuallybeento Heaton. Loath as I was to do that for the first time in costume, about to shoot, I’m even more reluctant to do it now for some forced show of camaraderie, knowing that everyone there will most likely be thinking about how I had an epidural at 4cm dilated, and that my son never grew heavier than 318g.
‘It will be all right,’ says Blake.
‘You’re only saying that because you don’t have to do it,’ says Felix, and again, I’m grateful to him.
Grateful to Nick, who, turning to go, instructs Blake to think of some other way to control this damage.
‘No,’ says Blake, stopping Nick short.
‘No?’ says Nick, raising his brow.
‘No?’ says Felix.
‘Wow,’ says Emma.
‘This has to happen,’ says Blake, and, in another set of circumstances, I might almost admire his nerve, holding his ground against our collective front. ‘You need to be at The Heaton Arms for twelve. They’re excited. There’ll be a bunch of photographers there to catch you going in and out. Ones we can trust. A few others will probably turn up, too.’
‘A few?’ says Nick. ‘Come on, Blake. We all know it’ll be a circus.’
‘It won’t,’ Blake insists. ‘I’m managing it.’
‘How?’ says Nick.
‘I’m not going,’ I say. ‘Absolutely not.’
‘You need to, Claudia,’ says Blake. ‘I don’t want to play this card … ’
‘Then don’t.’
‘But contractually … ’
‘Seriously, Blake?’
‘For Christ’s sake,’ says Nick. ‘You don’t think she’s been through enough?’
‘Of course I do,’ says Blake. ‘But contractually, you all have to do publicity that’s deemed in the best interests of the movie. And I very much consider the world holding faith that the four of you aren’t about to keel over or combust as being in the best interests of this movie.The Screencalled me this morning asking for a comment on whether there’s anything behind the rumours that the studio are about to call it all off. I told them no, obviously, but those rumours are coming from somewhere. Where there’s smoke … ’
‘I still don’t see why I have to have lunch,’ says Emma. ‘I could just go for a walk, take Rusty again. Do anything, actually, that doesn’t involve eating.’
‘No, you need to be there,’ says Blake. ‘It will look too staged if it’s only Nick, Felix and Claudia.’
