He shook his head and looked away. “I need to collect my thoughts.”
I nodded and stood, intending to return to my work, but he grabbed my hand. His fingers were surprisingly strong, gripping me until it hurt. “It won’t be much longer. I need you to accept that.”
I swallowed the lump in my throat and didn’t contradict him, even though everything in me wanted to reject his statement.
His grip lightened, but he didn’t let me go. “You know what it’s like to live over a century. It’s a long time. Too long at this point. But I can feel my time coming to an end.”
His mind was still sharp in some ways, even when the rest of him wanted to give up. It was something I appreciated most about him. “I don’t want that to be true.”
“Well, it is.” His scowl and harsh tone made the words sink into my soul and take hold. Acceptance was a slow process, creeping over me like a rain cloud. With it came the tears I didn’t want to shed in front of him. He pulled a handkerchief from his pocket and handed it to me.
I took it with a thank-you and wiped my cheeks. “Sorry.”
“Don’t be. No one else is going to cry over me. I’m too ornery.” Despite his words, he was actually a cool guy with plenty of cool stories.
Somewhere in the last three years, he’d become family to me. He was the only male role model I’d ever had. The universe might have made me wait a long time for one, but the wait was worth it. They sent me the best guy on the planet.
“Don’t shed too many tears after I pass. Give yourself a day, then move on with your life.” He leaned forward. His watch clinked against his oxygen tank. “There’s a box in my bedroom closet. Top shelf, all the way to the right. It’s metal and has a lock. The key is in the kitchen junk drawer. You’ll have to search around a bit.”
“What’s inside?”
“My will, for one. But some other things, too. The coin inside looks like a normal half-dollar, but it’s not. Don’t go spending it until you get it appraised. The lighter is...” He smiled as if a memory had just assaulted him, but it was the best kind of memory. “I’ve waited a long time to see Charlie. But my wait is finally ending.”
“Did the lighter belong to your friend?” I hadn’t heard this story before.
“He was more than my friend. He was the love of my life.” Gary didn’t have to say they were lovers. The smile was still there, but with it came a gentle pain visible in the creases of his face, as if losing Charlie had left a wound that might have scarred over throughout the years, yet the scars still ached sometimes.
“I’m sorry you lost him.”
“We’d talked about living on the West Coast, on the beach. Charlie loved the water. I teased him all the time for being salty because he was an ocean baby, and I grew up here, near the lake, salt- and shark-free.”
I smiled. I had a shirt that said something similar. It was a few years old and a little beat-up. I wore it only when working in my shop. I didn’t have it that day. Instead, I wore a faded black T-shirt with a small hole on the side.
Gary shook his head. “It wasn’t safe for same-sex couples back then. Sometimes I think I’m back there, lying beside him. He talks to me in my sleep. Just started that. He’s the one who told me death was coming for me and to make sure you had the box.”
Whoa, was Gary getting a little senile? Maybe. Or maybe he really saw his dead lover in his dreams. Gary had lived longer than most people, surpassing the average life expectancy by twenty-seven years. The poor guy had gone a lifetime and then some without him, grieving every day. So if he said he saw his dead lover in his dreams, who was I to say he didn’t? “Why me?”
Gary tightened his grip on mine. “Because I love you like you’re my child. Hell, I’m old enough to be your granddad.”
I stood and hugged him. “I love you, too.”
He stood and sighed. He was already an old man, yet his skin had taken on a gray pallor that made him look even older. “Do you mind walking me home? I’m worn out.”
I picked up the oxygen tank. It was in one of those green bags you could carry like a purse. Then I held him around the waist and guided him to the wheelchair. He walked more slowly than usual, taking each step carefully.
When we entered his house, I helped him into bed and tucked the covers around him. He was nearly asleep the second he laid his head on the pillow. “I’ll get you a glass of water.”
He nodded but didn’t respond. I was almost out of the room when he finally spoke. “Send Silvia to check on me. Just in case.”
Just in case of what? Just in case he didn’t wake up from his nap? God, I hoped that wasn’t what he meant, but it probably was. “I’ll call her.”
I’d honor his wishes. Siliva was one of the best nurses he had. If anyone knew how to help Gary as he was declining, it was her. I didn’t want to find him if the worst happened, but it wasn’t about me. “Maybe I should start staying with you.”
Gary didn’t open his eyes. “Have Silvia stay tonight.”
I rubbed his arm, then left the room for a glass of water. He was asleep when I set the glass on his nightstand.
I called Silvia from his landline. Yeah, Gary was old-school about technological advances. He was one hundred two years old, so he got a pass on most things, including technology. “How’s he doing, hon?”
