Present day
I need to get off of the floor.
Get up, Julia.
Stand up.
I repeat the messages to myself for what has to be the eightieth time since I first laid down here. The afternoon sun ispouring in from the small window at the top of the door and into the living room from the windows next to our couch.
It’s so sunny. So warm.
This is the kind of day that I’d find any reason to spend outside, but my body is glued to its spot on the floor. I haven’t been able to move at all since Tripp left last night. My swollen face and my body ache. I’ve had to pee for the past half hour, but I can’t get up.
I can’t exist without knowing that my husband is coming home to me.
I think my phone must have died at some point, because it was vibrating wildly against the coffee table for hours, then it suddenly stopped.
My battery is gone, too,I think.
My stomach growls loudly, the sting of bile following in my throat at the mere thought of trying to eat something. I’m too empty.
The sound of a car door slamming shut outside is the only thing that forces me to my feet. I desperately reach for the door handle and pull it open, running toward the driveway, but there isn’t anything there. Scanning the street with my eyes, I see a neighbor across the way pulling grocery bags from their trunk, and my heart plummets once more through the empty vessel that is now my body.
All I can hear as I stare at the empty pavement in front of our house is seventeen-year-old Tripp’s voice.
‘I’ll catch you later, Jules.’
Chapter 16
CONNOR
“Hey,” I shout into the studio as I enter, “T-Mo, where are you?”
“Not here,” one of the artists calls back to me.
I thought I would be more relieved to hear that, but instead, I find that I’m only about thirty-three percent of the way relieved; the other sixty-seven percent is reserving itself for worry.
Worry. Shame. Guilt. Horror. Whatever name you’d like to give it.
As I walk toward my station, I drop my helmet onto my desk. “Do you know where he is?”
“He said something about staying with his brother for a few days,” he answers. “I think he’s getting burnt out.”
“Yeah,” I nod.
He’s with his family,I tell myself. The comfort that comes with that thought is quickly erased and replaced by another.It’s so bad, he flew out to be with hisfamily.
I can’t imagine that he would go to Graham for this. Brody would at least give him space, but…god, I’m a piece of crap. Any second now, someone is going to walk through the front doorof the shop, carrying a massive trophy engraved with the words ‘world’s worst friend,’ and they’re going to hand it to me.
“I’ll bet his wife’s running around on him,” I hear from another station. “You don’t up and leave the state unless something major happens.”
“Don’t start rumors,” I bark at him. As I move to the front door to unlock it, I add, “Just shut up and do your jobs. He’ll be back soon.”
I don’t know that I believe myself when I say that. There’s an entirely real possibility that he’s gone for good. He picked up his entire life back in New York and left it all behind with less than a day’s notice, why wouldn’t he do it here, too?
Dropping into my stool, I huff as I reach for my phone to send Julia another text message, this time telling her that Tripp flew home. I send another asking if she’s okay, but she doesn’t respond to either one of them. I haven’t heard a peep from her since the night that Tripp found out about us.
I’m starting to look desperate.
