Who had vanished as swiftly as the wind, and just as completely.
Chapter Eleven
I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m so, so sorry!”
Jace hadn’t stopped saying it since we returned, nor had he let go for more than the short time it had taken me to rinse off some of the blood.And to try and sort out my very disrupted internal life, because my wolf hadn’t wanted to calm down and go back to sleep.It still didn’t, prowling around my psyche in a way she never did, agitated and angry, and ready to tear loose at any moment.
It was embarrassing, like the trip back here, when I had been more in wolf mind than human.To the point that I’d gotten into one of the faces of the huge Arnou guards Sebastian had sent to bring us back, when he’d said or done something I didn’t like.I couldn’t even remember what it was; something derogatory toward Jace, probably, but I had been across the width of the limo so fast it had actually made him blink.
We’d stayed like that for an uncomfortable—for him, I was too out of it to notice—amount of time, before he manned up and apologized.I hadn’t understood the words, too lost in wolf mind, but the lowering of his eyes allowed me to resume my seat.And to stay on the very edge, hyper vigilant and untrusting of this other clan, one they said was mine, but that didn’t feel like it.
And then we were back at Dante’s, and I was staring at myself in the bathroom mirror of my suite, unsure who I was looking at.Didn’t look like me.Skin too soft, too clear, hair too smooth, even with blood matting it in places, teeth too blunt…
Only the eyes were familiar, only the eyes were right.Blood red and furious in a human skull.Wolf eyes.
And forcing them to go back to normal had felt wrong, almost obscene.I wanted to go the other way, wanted to be fully in my other form, needed the power it gave to protect.Only to protect what I didn’t know, as the danger was over.
But I hadn’t believed that then and didn’t now.I was having to exert so much control to stay human that it scared me, and I knew the rest of the clan could feel it.A Lupa’s agitation was never merely her own, but Cyrus was still missing, and none of the boys were senior enough to calm me.
Not that they probably could have anyway, as they were just as angry as I was.They hadn’t been there, hadn’t been blooded, hadn’t fought at my side, and they were furious about it.Partly with me for sending them away, partly with themselves for not getting back in time, and partly—a large part—for Arnou, who they had snapped and snarled at when its wolves took their time getting to the huge underground battlefield, and had then dared to question me.
Me, with the meat of my enemies dripping out of my hair and stuck between my teeth, their blood covering my face.Me, with a traumatized, still-spelled boy clutched against me, who was half-crazed from fighting the paralytic the dark mage had used on him.Me, who had turned on them with blood-colored eyes and shoved my cub behind me, ready to fight.
My clan had dragged me out of there instead, myrealclan, the Fireborn, but not before getting a damned good view of what we were leaving behind.Zombie parts flopping like dying fish on the ground; Jen with neon green eyes and a vicious snarl, watching several of her creatures rip one of their old masters apart and not even flinching when the man screamed; mages kneeling in glowing, magical handcuffs while grim-faced Corpsmen gagged them.And their Lupa, covered in blood and the wounds of battle—one they had missed.
It wasn’t because of anything they had done.
They had raced back here in record time, but it had taken far too long to get anyone to listen to them.They were blaming themselves for that, even though it wasn’t their fault.Arnou’s guards had refused to allow them anywhere near Sebastian, and it hadn’t been until they made enough of a ruckus to get Cyrus’s attention that anything had gotten done.
Cyrus had been there, too, in Tartarus, and in wolf form.I remembered that, but it was vague, almost dream-like.He had been the one yelling at them to get me out, and I had been confused as to why they were listening to him.
He had felt more like a friendly ally, someone I’d heard about but barely knew, than a mate, and was thus barely acknowledged, something he had put down to shock.But I knew shock, and this wasn’t it.I didn’t know what this was.
So, yeah, it had been a shit show and was unlikely to get better if I didn’t snap out of it!Especially now that I’d been summoned once again.My eyes met the worried ones of Laura Brightfeather, Sienna’s cousin, a soft, round, motherly-looking woman with short dark hair just beginning to go gray in strands, but so artfully that it made her look like she’d had expensive highlights.
She hadn’t.She didn’t care about such things, Sienna being the fashionista of their small clan.Laura was wearing her usual ensemble of an embroidered floral blouse, pink in this case, a pair of Mom jeans, and some sneakers.They were pink, too, and if anybody had ever looked non-threatening…
It wasn’t her.Because when she tried to pull Jace gently away from me, and he screamed bloody murder, her kind, soft eyes flashed yellow for an instant.She was just as furious about what had happened to him as I was, but didn’t have any more ideas of what to do about it.
But someone else did.
“Ah, there you are,” Sienna swept into the suite like the force of nature she was, wearing a flowing, yellow silk caftan.
It said without words that she’d been one of the Weres who’d shown up to our rescue in Tartarus.Andthe fact that she still had it on said that she wasn’t sure she wouldn’t have to Change again today, so she was wearing something loose and unbinding.The fact that it looked fantastic on her was beside the point.
The entrance was good enough that it took me a moment to notice that she had someone with her.He was a kindly-looking man in his mid-forties, and he was Were; I could smell it on him.But it was the only damned way I knew.
He was short, balding, skinny, and had a pair of glasses perched on top of his head that I would be willing to bet money he’d forgotten were there.He’d probably be looking for them later, and someone would have to tell him where they were, and then he’d chuckle over it instead of getting embarrassed.Because he exuded the centered, even temper that Weres were most definitely not known for.
I knew what he was before he spoke.
“Lia, this is David Hitcherson.”
“Dave, please,” he said, taking my hand.If he was bothered by the dried blood on it, because I hadn’t done so great with the clean-up, he didn’t say.
“He’s here to talk to Jace,” Sienna said briskly, as if this had somehow already been decided.“So you can come along and see Sebastian.He is anxious to hear your side of things.”
“You’re here to debrief us?”Sophie said, regarding ‘Dave’ narrowly.
