“Being on the road is a lot. I don’t know how you all do it,” I admit honestly.
She shrugs. “You get used to it after a while.”
I nod, looking back out the window. After a few minutes, she speaks again.
“What are your long-term plans?”
Isn’t that the million-dollar question? The truth is, I left on a whim. I hadn’t made any long-term plans. I left because my son begged me to. I couldn’t stay a moment longer.
“I don’t know,” I admit
“Do you want to settle down somewhere?”
“I would love to settle, but my husband…” I swallow the lump in my throat. “He has connections. If I stop, he will find me. To be completely honest with you, I feel like he is a ghost chasing us. I worry at every stop he will catch up, and when he does…”
“He’s not a good man,” she says, not making me speak the words.
“No,” I whisper.
“So you stay on the run forever?” she asks.
“I have some money to keep us going, but not forever. I guess I am playing a losing game. Either he finds me now or in a few months. Either way, he will find me. I have no way to stop him.”
We go quiet once more. I get lost in my thoughts.
I’m failing my children. I am supposed to keep them safe, but how can I when one of the people who is supposed to love them is the one who wants to hurt them? What am I supposed to do?
If he ever catches up with me, he won’t hurt me right away. No, he will likely already be building a case against me. I can’t come up missing, otherwise it would look suspicious on him. He’s smarter than that.
No, he will have a plan in place. I’ll die from an accident, or maybe he will let me live, but he will take the children. It wouldn’t take too terribly much to convince a judge that I’m anunfit mother. I think that would kill me more than him actually killing me.
“Do you trust me?”
The question is so sudden that I have to turn and look at Bertha.
“I do,” I admit.
Trust isn’t easy to come by, but so far, these truckers have been my heroes. None of them have tried to harm us in any way. I trust them as much as I can trust someone.
“I have a possible solution. It’s going to seem a bit crazy, but I need you to know I wouldn’t propose it if I thought it was dangerous.”
I nod. “Okay. I’m all ears.”
“I have a brother. He isn’t quite on the right side of the law. He’s not a bad guy, but he doesn’t always do the best things. He is respectful to women, though, and he will treat your children well.”
My eyes widen. “I can’t go live with another man. I’m sorry. I understand you are trying to help, but I can’t. I won’t.” I look back out the window.
“You wouldn’t be living with him. I only meant he would protect you. He has a rental home that is available. Your main problem is that you can’t settle down without the sperm donor finding you.” I smile at her nickname for Evan. “My brother would be willing to rent it to you under the table. It would give you a place to figure out what to do next and give you some stability.”
“So…no paper trails,” I murmur.
“Exactly. Besides, if for some reason you are found, he would protect you and the kids. He and his brothers.”
I frown. “How many brothers do you have?” I ask her.
She laughs. “Just the one, but he has many he considers brothers. All of them are good men. He wouldn’t be friends with them if they weren’t.”
I’m not sure, but the temptation of being able to be still for a little bit is almost too much.
