Less than thirty minutes after her father made a catch that will forever be memorialized in the record books, Rose Cunningham Humblecut decided she wanted to be part of the celebration too.
I have no idea who she looks like—she’s a wrinkly mess—but she’s the most beautiful wrinkly mess I’ve ever seen in my life. I’m kind of in shock that we created her.
Our families just left. My dad openly wept when he met Rose. It made me cry to see him so emotional over her. He and Daylen even hugged, no small feat considering how the day started.
Vance and Sulley walk in with huge smiles on their faces. Sulley runs straight to my bedside. “How are you?”
I exhale a long breath, not really knowing the answer. “Well, nine inches went in, but twenty-one came out, so how do you think I feel?”
She bursts out laughing. “I suppose that’s one way to look at it.”
Daylen mumbles, “I think it’s closer to ten inches.”
I point to my horrifically aching and sore lower half. “There will be zero inches going in for the foreseeable future.”
He deadpans, “Your mouth still works, doesn’t it? You know my favorite holiday is Suck a Dick Sunday. Today is Suck a Dick Super Bowl Sunday.”
I narrow my eyes at him. “I just pushed your giant, nine-pound baby out of me without any drugs. That little holiday of yours is on hiatus.”
He twists his lips. “Hmm, I guess I’m not heartless. We can skip this week. But just one.”
Vance and Sulley laugh while I glare at my husband with murderous intent. He smiles and winks at me.
They spend the next ten minutes oohing and ahhing over Rose, but when she begins to get fussy, Daylen kicks them out so I can feed her.
He gently places her in my arms. I look up at him. “I’m scared. What if I hold her wrong?”
“You’re doing just fine.” He gives me a little demonstration. “Hold her like a football. You need to support her head until her neck muscles develop.”
I gasp. “She was born without neck muscles? Is that bad? Should we get the doctor?”
He chuckles. “All babies are born with weak muscles. It takes a few weeks for them to strengthen.”
“What if I drop her?”
He raises an eyebrow. “You’re one of the best athletes in the world. I don’t see it happening.” He cups my cheek with his hand. “Babe, you’ll be fine.”
“You’llbe fine, you’re an expert.I’mgoing to fuck up.”
He shakes his head. “We’re both going to fuck up. That’s normal. I had the benefit of a baby sister when I was sixteen, or Iwouldn’t know anything either. You’ll be up to speed in no time at all.”
She starts wiggling in my arms. “She hates me,” I pout.
He rolls his eyes. “She’s hungry. She just did the same thing in my arms.”
I pull out my nipple for her to take into her mouth and wince when she latches on. “Fuck, was she born with razor-blade teeth?”
He shakes his head. “No teeth. Yet.”
“Is it normal to not have teeth when you’re born?”
He smiles. “Yes. Relax. Look at you two right now. It’s the most natural, beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. Enjoy yourself. Don’t worry. Take it all in.”
I stare down at her in wonderment as she happily sucks away. It’s wacky, but in an amazing way.
He smiles. “See, you gave her exactly what she needed.”
I nod with a heavy dose of pride. I suppose I did. “She’s good at this. Did you see how quickly she latched on? I read that a lot of babies struggle with that at first.”
