But when I met with his teacher, it wasn’t about his behavior. His teacher had sent several notices about his performance. Our son was in danger of failing the second grade, and I had no clue because I trusted my husband to do his job as a parent. I drove back home instead of the office with angry tears falling down my cheeks. I wasn’t in a position to pretend in front of our employees, and I didn’t care about the land grant meeting that I usually ran. I was tired of making excuses for Kody.
He’d let me down once again.
“Do you have any more blue tickets for the raffle?” I searched through my bag for the umpteenth time before placing it back under the table. “I think we’re running out.”
Lori, my best friend from high school, who manned the registration table, answered, “Improvise. Either tell people that we ran out or find some other way to give people a chance to win.” She smiled at an approaching couple.
“You know I hate improvising when we’ve been planning this for months.” I scrambled through the boxes next to her. “They’re somewhere around.”
She waved her hand. “Relax, Jamaica, and enjoy yourself. Dance with one of these single classmates and let it get back to Kody and make him jealous.”
“Kody isn’t worried about me.” I chuckled and knelt to look under the table where we’d kept more forms and pens. “He would be here instead of Atlanta if he did. I don’t know whyhe insisted on meeting with the Alloid Group right before the reunion. He promises he’ll catch an early flight and be here in time for the barbecue tomorrow.”
“And that’s a problem. He should be here with you. He takes you for granted.” She tapped the table for emphasis with her pen. “You need to remind him that you’re a beautiful woman who can have any man she wants.”
“Trying to make him jealous won’t change a damn thing. He knows I’m not going anywhere.” I believed in marriage like my parents and my grandparents, who’d weathered all kinds of storms together. Kody and I would be no different. We’d been married for almost eight years when relationships didn’t last longer than the ink drying on the marriage certificate. Yes, there were times I wondered if I’d made a mistake marrying him when my heart longed for a man who would never return. And maybe deep down, that’s why I forgave his indiscretion and his tendency to make decisions without involving me or our children.
Kody and I had argued about KJ, and he admitted that he’d only seen two emails about our son’s behavior, ignoring the rest and assuming they were more of the same. After I accused him of being selfish and not caring if our son failed, he humbled himself by apologizing for not taking the teacher seriously. He said that he would personally tutor KJ since math and science were his strengths. Kody promised to be better about being there for the boys and for me. He pulled me to him, and we had make-up sex in his office like we used to. In the last two weeks, he’d kept his word, and KJ loved that he had his father’s undivided attention every evening before dinner. And our marriage seemed to settle back into a peaceful existence again.
“You should at least make him think you will. Make him feel what it would be like not to have you. When he thinks he lost you is the only time he acts right.” Lori’s constant tapping footstilled, and she whispered, “Um…why didn’t you tell me that Freedom Cade was coming tonight?”
My heart stopped beating. Still kneeling and facing away from the doors, I looked up at her. “What?”
Did I hear right?
“He’s walking through the door by himself, followed by some of his fans…well, our classmates are trying to get his attention. How did he even know about our reunion? I heard he didn’t want anything to do with Oak Valley High.”
Unable to push air completely through my lungs, I hissed, “Are you serious? Is Freedom Cade here? Right now?”
Lori sat straighter, and a goofy smile crawled across her face. “Ooh, he looks too damn good. Who wears black leather in March in Texas? But Lord knows, this man can. TV doesn’t do him justice. He’s even sexier than high school. He has money and power to back his natural swag. Ooh, you know I love bad boys. Girl, I don’t know why you didn’t wait for that man. You used to have him wrapped around your finger.” She then looked down at me, her caramel skin flushed red with excitement. “He just smiled at me and is looking at your backside with a curious frown. Probably knows it’s you. Might want to stand and give that man a hug for old time’s sake. Or at least allow me to live through you vicariously.”
Like the coward I had no problem claiming I was, without looking in his direction, I stood and walked briskly back into the ballroom, searching desperately for my husband. Until I remembered he was stuck in Atlanta because of work and wouldn’t be here until tomorrow. I had no protection from the one person who remained in the periphery of my mind and heart. Luckily, everyone was too busy rushing past me to see Freedom to pay any attention to the frantic mess I must have appeared to others as I looked around the purple and gold ballroom that I’d decorated earlier today, trying to findsomething to keep me occupied. I had to stay away. I had to keep my distance.
The din of the crowd grew louder from Freedom’s unexpected appearance than the music playing. I took deep, settling breaths as I approached the DJ’s booth. He pushed his headphones to one ear to hear me.
I weakly smiled. “Freedom Cade, one of our classmates, just walked in. Play one of his songs and announce him. Draw everyone back into the ballroom. They’re all gathering in the tiny hallway, and that’s probably a violation.”
“Is that why everyone is leaving?” The DJ’s eyes and mouth opened wide as he looked toward the door, while my classmates hurried to the star walking on Earth amongst us mere humans. The DJ, a college student and stepson of one of my classmates, quickly scrambled to find music on his electronic board while he announced, “Oak Valley High, Class of 2010, we’re humbled to be graced with the presence of a future legend, hip-hop and country star, Freedom Cade.”
Runaway Heart, his first hit, blasted, and our classmates crowded Freedom before he could enter the ballroom. I stepped back, partially blocked by the DJ’s booth and the barely lit room. From this position, I could openly stare at him. Lori was right. The eighteen-year-old I last knew, who had been naturally fit with a broad chest, now had the frame of a man who worked out. His defined muscles were visible through his fitted t-shirt, and the black leather jacket hugged his biceps. His mocha skin remained flawless. The soft hair I loved to twist grew wild at the top of his head, and his mustache and beard were trimmed and groomed in such a way that he still appeared scruffy yet undeniably sexy. He wore shades so I couldn’t see his eyes, which was probably for the best. His eyes were always my weakness. Even more than his smile, which he now freely bestowed on his former classmates as he waved with his cowboyhat in his hand. Freedom looked damn good, and success and happiness emanated from him.
And why wouldn’t he be? He’d made good on his promise to be the success he’d aspired to be. He’d used his God-given talent to pull himself and his family out of poverty into generational wealth.
Freedom must have sensed my stare through his throng of fans, formerly known as our classmates. He glanced towards me, and I retreated quickly behind the booth. Luckily, the DJ was too enthralled by Freedom to pay attention to me, as I entangled myself in his cords. I had to stay out of my ex’s path. Keep moving and roaming this whole place, using my role as the organizer as an excuse. My fast-beating heart couldn’t take seeing him up close and personal. Couldn’t take hearing his voice say my name or drawing me in for a hug.
NOPE.
If I were to avoid temptation, I had to avoid him like the plague. I stared at my wedding ring and the vows I’d made and looked back up at Freedom, who’d pushed his shades over his head and stared at me from across the room. For a second, time stood still, and instinctively, I knew he felt it too. We were that young couple in love who believed we had forever.
“Ms. Jamaica, do you want me to play a medley of his hits or return to the reunion playlist? This place is wild, and I don’t want to break the flow.” The DJ thankfully interrupted our moment.
I turned to the DJ. “Um…whatever your vibe feels. I trust you’ll keep the party hyped with or without Freedom Cade. I need to check on a few things.”
He grinned and held the mic. “Let’s continue to rock out to Freedom Cade and some more of his hits from the past and today.”
The crowd cheered, and I dipped out of the ballroom and into a small hall away from everyone on the side of the building. Unfortunately, I didn’t have a cell phone or any other way to communicate with Lori, except to go back through the ballroom. I paced back and forth, rubbing my hands together. I couldn’t hide out here forever. I needed to suck it up, speak to him while he was around his adoring fans, and run the event as I’d planned. I didn’t need to freak out just because my first love is on the other side of the door. Most people don’t end up with their first loves. It’s not a big deal.
“Chill. Relax. Breathe. You have a husband and family you love,” I whispered and closed my eyes.
