“I do have the right. Now, I’ll respect your ring around others.” He pulled me lower on the bed by my feet, and the bed sank as he hovered over me. “When it’s just you and me, I don’t care about this ring. If you want to fuck, we fuck. If you want to talk, we talk. You’re my baby, and I’m yours. We love each other, and that shit ain’t going nowhere. You can’t tell me that tonight, we didn’t feel right, that Jamie didn’t feel right with me and with us. You and Peace act like no time has passed. You are my family.”
I pleaded with him. “I can’t keep cheating on Kody. I told him about us.”
“I know.” I scoffed, “He told me he would kill me if I fucked you again.”
Worry lines etched in her forehead. “You can’t take what he said lightly. People get killed all the time because of affairs.”
“I’m not scared of Kody, and he won’t hurt me anyway.” He lowered his head to punctuate his words with kisses on my face and neck. “He. Don’t. Love. You. Like. I. Do.”
I giggled at his antics despite my best intentions not to.
Freedom’s lips formed a disapproving line. “He doesn’t love my son the way he should, either.”
“It’s been hours, Free. You’ve known Jamie for hours. You can’t judge Kody.”
“My son is in therapy because he feels like he can’t be himself around Kody or his granddad. He told me that while we were playing the guitar together.”
“He told you that?” Guilt flamed my face. My son couldn’t tell me something he easily told Freedom. My God, my son had been starving for the attention of a man who allowed him to just be.He sensed it in Peace and Freedom.What would my son have been like if these two men had been in his life all along?
“Yeah. I think he and I should spend more time together. He loves music, and I can teach him instruments. You don’t have to make a decision now. But I want him to come on tour with me this summer. Maybe just to Paris and London. Peace could join in or even you if you want someone else to be with him.”
I rolled from underneath him and curled into a fetal position.Too much. Too much.
“Okay. I can take a hint.” He resignedly kissed my cheek and eased out of the bed. “See you in the morning.”
The softness and warmth of a blanket covered me, and he turned the light off and left the room just as the tears fell.
Being a father gave me a new sense of responsibility and purpose. I no longer craved alcohol or drugs, liking myself more now that I was sober. Jamie and I spoke every day about his school work, about his hopes and dreams, and even shared some song lyrics. He texted me good night without fail for the last month, and I loved it.
Jamie was the kind of kid you rarely had to reprimand. He was polite, respectful, and funny. He might have been fascinated with my career and money, but I was fascinated with a young boy who wasn’t caught up in social media or succumbing to peer pressure. I loved that Jamie walked to his own tune. Whatever issues I might have with Kody, he’d helped Jamaica raise a good son. Jamaica had been right. I’d judged Kody harshly about his parenting. Flashbacks of my father’s hatred of something he didn’t understand had tainted my thoughts about Kody. From what I gleaned from Jamie, although he didn’t want todisappoint Kody, it sounded like it came from a place of respect and not fear. Most children didn’t want to disappoint their parents.
Jamaica had been keeping her distance since the conversation in the guest room, and I gave her space. She’d already told me she was overwhelmed, and I added to her plate when I desired to subtract. We hadn’t talked or texted since the Sunday they left. That whole day, we all hung out together, enjoying each other, and I never had her to myself again. I missed her, but the daily talks with Jamie made up for not communicating with her.
My tour was over, and I wouldn’t hit the road again until early September. It was the end of April, and I was back in Dallas to review the final plans so they could break ground tomorrow. I’d leased a house while my new home was under construction, so Jamie had a place to visit me. This afternoon, he would spend the night with me, and I would bring him to school. We were both excited about my new move, and I relished the bond we were building.
I pulled into the driveway of Happy Homes, Jamaica and Kody’s construction business. It was in a quaint house that had been remodeled into a business. I liked the feel from the outside. It seemed so Jamaica. Warm and cozy. They’d done well enough for themselves without my money. Mixed feelings assailed me, and I jammed my hands in my pockets as I walked up the stairs.Was I a glutton for punishment to work so closely with a man I no longer trusted and was married to the love of my life?
The receptionist stopped mid-sentence of her call when I walked in. Her mouth flew open. Used to this reaction, I smiled. “Keep talking. When you get a chance, let Mr. Griffin know I’m here.”
I adjusted my pants before I sat down and pulled out a toothpick.
Kody waltzed in from the front door, apologizing. “Sorry, I’m late. Got stuck at home, helping Jamaica with some stuff around the house. Told her you were coming in today, and I needed to run. Still gave me lists to do.” He barely looked at me, though I assumed everything he said was addressed to me.
“I’m not in a rush. I’ve already approved most of the plans. Just need to make sure there’s space for the horses.” I slowly stood, and we quietly assessed each other. Admittedly, he looked good, and his once round face slimmed down into an angular one. The gold band on his finger and the nice suits made him even more appealing to women. He looked the part of a husband whose wife should feel lucky to have him, and I hated the twinge of jealousy that panged my heart. He had my Jamaica in his bed every night for years. She cooked for him, sexed him, took care of his children, helped him with his business, and made his house a home. Her absence was clearly felt at my house after she’d only been there two days. Whether he ever loved her like I did, he didn’t want to lose her, either.
He finally held his hand out. “For the friends we were.”
I took it. “Or the friends I thought we were.”
Kody’s jawline tightened in acknowledgement.
The receptionist finally got off the phone and waved at me. “Can I have a pic? My sister didn’t believe me when I told her that Freedom Cade was here.”
“Trina.” Kody admonished.
“It’s fine.” I walked over to her, and she bounced on her heels as she held the camera to our faces. At the last minute, I kissed her cheek. She squealed. The look of surprise on her face captured on camera was priceless.
“Thank you, Freedom,” She gushed.
