“It’s so hard to hate you. For weeks, I’ve been tryna find shit to distract me from missing you, and nothin’ works. I know you’re sorry, but you hurt me, Alexis. Who’s to say you won’t do it again?”
“My words may not have your trust the way they did before, but I need you to believe me when I say I won’t. I need my wife to come home.”
She snatched a Kleenex off the center table and cleaned herself up. She went to her desk, grabbed her keys, and headed out the door. I was confused on what was happenin’. In midconversation, she just stopped responding. I followed every footstep ’til we were outside the building.
“Journei, we were talkin’. The fuck is you goin’?” I questioned after grabbing her arm to stop her.
“Home, where my wife needs me.”
Journei
What I did to Christian a few weeks ago was wrong and selfish on so many levels. I was hurting from the pain Alexis caused and used that as my opportunity to act on the way Christian made me feel. Voicing the effect he had on me ended with us goin’ round for round. We exchanged so much that night. What I gave him, he gave me. And I’d never had that, not even with Alexis.
He expressed numerous times in between sessions on how weak I made him. I could see how much he battled with staying away from me. Christian pulled at my soul, and the only way I felt like he could touch it was when our bodies became one.
That next morning, I found a letter on the bed from Christian that recited itself at least once a day in my head.
Out of every sin I’ve committed, you are my favorite one. I went against my beliefs last night being with you. I gave into temptation and loved it. I don’t know what you’re doin’ to me, but I can’t be anywhere around you. As a man of God, I lose all sense, composure, and, most of all, respect. That goes for my career, you, and your marriage. What we did was magical to me but also wrong. Distance would do us both some good. Your car is parked out front… I’m sorry, beautiful.
-Christian
I was hurt by what I read. Christian was removing himself from my life before I had the chance to enjoy him. After reading the letter, I waited for him to return to his condo. He never showed, givin’ me no choice but to leave. I left his residence with sexual memories that haunted me. Anytime I thought about him, my pussy threw a fit, and a dark cloud hovered. I missed him… period.
However, I still had a wife that I loved. My marriage was my reality. Alexis showed up at Ties & Tips apologizing, which she didn’t have to do. I knew she was sorry from the way she stalked me. Alexis had a flashy car with a license plate that read LEX007. She popped up everywhere she thought I’d be, and I watched her do it.
Goin’ home to my wife was always the end result. I needed space to clear my head, and I did that… for the most part. She wasn’t perfect, but with everything she’d done for me, that was how I viewed her. I placed her on a pedestal when I shouldn’t have. She made mistakes like anyone else.
“Hey, my wife. You smell good.” Alexis complimented me before I could step around her desk. That damn Burberry Her gave me away every time.
“Thank you, baby. I brought you some lunch.” I held up a takeout bag from a Japanese restaurant called Katana’s.
“And I just sent Sierra to get me some food. Let me call her right quick.”
“No, let her get it. I’m gon’ eat mine and probably half of yours. I’m hungry as fuck today.” And I really was. My appetite had picked up these last few days.
She nodded and reached for the bag. We were in a better space. I still didn’t trust Alexis, but I was givin’ her a chance to change that. She let me see the text Trina sent, and I wasn’t even mad. I knew the type of vibe my wife brought, so I wasn’tsurprised that she wanted it back. If she popped her ass up at my house though, I was goin’ in her mouth. Plain and simple.
With Alexis being in the drug business, I had to catch her when I could if she wasn’t home. Thankfully, she was at her main warehouse, gettin’ prepared for a shipment comin’ in. I was never allowed to be there for more than an hour. She said too much went on, and the less I knew, the better.
I bent down and kissed those lips that’d been making me leak like a faucet. She was actually missed today. That, or my emotions were missed placed. Either way, I wanted to be rubbed on and shown some affection. I made my way to the recliners she had in there and waited ’til she sat so I could put my legs in her lap.
We sat and enjoyed our food. Moments like that I loved. Since her fuckup, she’d been requesting more quality time, and I was all for it. Alexis wasn’t a mushy wife that catered to my sensitive and lovey-dovey feelings. She told me where we stood, how she felt, and what she wanted. Without emotions might I add.
“That was a good choice, baby. I like that zucchini they added.”
“Me too. I’m tired as fuck now though,” I said, gettin’ extra comfortable.
“Journei don’t play with me. Get the fuck out this warehouse and take yo’ ass home. After the shipment, I’ll be there.” She removed my legs from her lap and went to grab my purse and keys.
“Not you gettin’ my shit for me. Girl, let me get out yo’ wack ass warehouse before I have to smack you.”
I got up, cleaned off the table, slipped my shoes on, and snatched my shit from Alexis. She pissed me off when she did that. I was on my way out the door when she cleared her throat. Stopping midstride, I rolled my eyes to the ceiling and walkedback over to her. I gave a lil’ baby peck to her lips and turned to leave.
“What I just tell you?”
“Man, here, damn.” I gave her another kiss that was more genuine. “I love you.”
She smiled and slapped my ass. “I love you too. Cook please.”
