I can’t listen. It’s torture, not being able to speak to Tori. I can barely keep my mind on the stage the whole rest of the time. We’re rehearsing an early scene, one with Mercutio, Benvolio and Romeo. I’m rubbish. I can feel it.
‘Stop.’ Mr Acevedo interrupts the scene. My heart sinks to my boots. Louis and Gideon look enquiringly at me. Mr Acevedo studies us. ‘May I ask where the problem is?’
‘Which problem?’ asks Louis.
‘Yes, which problem . . . Which problem? Let’s ask our Romeo.’
All eyes are on me and I want to die.
‘Charles, please. What’s wrong?’
‘Nothing, I . . .’ My voice fails, and someone laughs. I kissed Tori and now she won’t look at me. That’s what’s wrong. ‘Wasn’t it any good?’
‘Wasn’t it any good?’ Mr Acevedo repeats. ‘Did it feel like it was good?’
I don’t reply. ‘No,’ I say in the end.
‘Well, there’s a thing.’ Mr Acevedo looks around the group. ‘So, make a note of that. If something doesn’t feel good, it’s very probable that it isn’t good.’
The others start talking. Mr Acevedo keeps looking at me.
‘I’m sorry. Shall I start again?’
He doesn’t react. What does he want? Am I meant to read his mind? I notice that I’m getting angry. Helpless, angry and overwhelmed. The others are whispering, heads together.
Mr Acevedo waves at the stage. ‘Please.’
What, then? Why’s he being so weird?
I exchange glances with Louis and Gideon, who are looking about as confused as I feel. I step a few paces to one side and take up my starting position. The others begin their dialogue, which is lively and engaging. The role of Benvolio seems tailor-made for Gideon. I make the mistake of looking to the side. Down to where Grace and the others are watching the scene intently. It’s only Tori who isn’t focused on Gideon and Louis. She’s watching me.
She chews her bottom lip gently and she has no idea how wild that drives me. Her lips are as red as her cheeks. I can feel her warm skin under my fingers and her soft mouth.
‘Charles!’
It makes me jump.
Fuck.
Louis and Gideon are looking expectantly at me, not speaking, which must mean that I’ve missed my cue.
‘OK, good.’ Mr Acevedo turns around. ‘We’re done for the day. You can pack up.’ There’s silence, followed by a murmur of voices. ‘Not you, though, Charles.’
Louis and Gideon are looking sympathetic as they leave the stage. Mr Acevedo beckons me down. Tori’s left.
‘I can make you replay the scene three times to try to get you up to your normal standards, or you can just tell me what’s wrong,’ says Mr Acevedo, as soon as we’re alone. ‘So, what’s wrong?’
‘It’s nothing.’ I clear my throat. ‘It’s been a long day. I’m sorry. I didn’t get much sleep.’
Mr Acevedo eyes me intently. ‘Well, do you honestly want me to advise you to go to bed in better time, or would you prefer to stop making this like getting blood out of a stone?’
Silence.
‘Does it have to do with anyone in this theatre?’
Stubborn silence.
‘If so, I would advise you to take a leaf out of Romeo’s book.’
