“We—sorry.”
We interrupt each other and stop, smiling timidly.
How is this the conversation that’s hard for us to have? I mean, for God’s sake, I’ve confessed my darkest fantasies to this man, but we’re struggling talking about our feelings.
His usually hard exterior is soft, the harshness I’m used to nowhere to be found. Sucking my bottom lip between my teeth, I contemplate a thousand things to say, not one of them forming on the tip of my tongue.
He watches with intention, his gaze searching mine desperately. He’s waiting for me to make the first move, letting me lead the conversation how I see fit.
Taking a slow, steady breath, I open my lips and let the truth come out. “You knew my rules, and you didn’t care.”
I can practically see the wordbutin the shape of his mouth. He stays silent.
“Instead, you went around every boundary I had set, infiltrating my life when I never would’ve let you if I’d known who you really were.” I take a shaky breath. “You don’t care about the rules. I know. I can tell. But Idid. Kerrigan may be my best friend, but my dad is one of the most important people in my life. Going behind his back like this was never something I wanted to do. You put me in a position where I had no choice.”
This time, his lips part to speak, but I cut him off, feeling the flood that has been building up inside of me finally break free.
“I’m still not entirely sure that this isn’t some game. That your buddies aren’t hiding in another room, listeningin and laughing at me.” I glance around at the thought before continuing, “I want to trust you and believe you, but it’s hard.”
I don’t even realize that I never met his stare again until I search for it, finding wetness welling up in his pained blue eyes. My heart pangs at the sight.
Swallowing hard, he breaks the silence. “I know where your distrust is coming from. I don’t blame you for it. For doubting me. The guys have helped, sure, but they’ve never crossed a line you wouldn’t have been comfortable with. And you have”—his face contorts with agony—“neverbeen a game to me.”
It’s everything I wanted to hear. But how can I truly believe him? I guess that’s the scary part—the choice you make when you hand your most vulnerable self over to another person. Trust isn’t something you can see or hold on to; it’s earned.
Reaching out, he grabs my hand, intertwining our fingers as he strides forward, pulling me along with him. “I’ll show you.”
What?
“What do you mean?” I ask, following along with him as he turns down a long hallway with vaulted ceilings, delicate chandeliers hanging from it.
He slams to a stop out of nowhere, positioned between two doors, one on either side of the path. Turning to face me, he gestures to the one at my right.
“W-what’s in there?” My voice is a stuttering, nervous whisper.
“Everything,” he exhales, like this is the moment of relief he’s been desperate for.
Tentatively, I reach out and grab the doorknob, twisting the handle until the door unlatches and gradually opens with a gentle push.
Oh. My. God.
I don’t know where to look or what to focus on first. It’s … a lot to take in.
It’s an office, transformed into the hub for all thingsstalking Serena Rafferty. In the center of the far wall is a massive desk, with at least ten monitors hanging above it, each one depicting a live feed into my house, my office, and—oh my God—there’s even one in my car.
“Bates …” I trail off, stepping fully into the room as my eyes wander to the table to the right.
It looks like a Michaels store threw up. Glue, paper, stickers, lace, stamps. I mean, the guys could start their own card company with the tools in here.
Slowly, I start to turn back to face him, but my sight catches on a pile of stuff in the corner. A dog bed, embroidered with Freddie’s name; a plethora of toys; endless bags of treats. Whoever robbed Michaels must’ve hit a Petco, too, by the looks of it.
“You did all this?” I murmur, my voice barely audible.
Then I jump, caught off guard by the sound of Freddie barking on one of the cameras.
The sound fills the room, and I don’t notice Bates stepping beside me until my skin is humming, desperate to feel him.
It’s fucked up, absolute insanity, that I’m looking at a display of cameras hidden in my home as I stand in an entire room dedicated to watchingme.
