“I’m . . .well, I guess I’m okay.” He’d told Cam the other night, when he’d found out about Simon, that he wasn’t. He’d had a few days to come to grips with the knowledge. He’d be hearing Alex out later tonight.
“Some shit happened that might have divided my focus, kind of like happened last season,” Dawson admitted.
“What shit?” Aidan didn’t sound accusatory. Only calm and curious.
“I talked to the prosecutor on my ex-father-in-law’s case, and it turns out that even though my lawyer kept insisting everyone wanted my stamp of approval on the plea deal, they didn’t want that at all. They wanted the opposite.”
“So your lawyer lied to you,” Aidan said, pursing his lips together. “Seriously?”
“Lawyerandagent,” Dawson said.
“Shit. Daws.” Aidan put a hand on his shoulder and pulled him in for a quick hug. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
Here it came. Aidan was going to say,why didn’t you tell me? Why didn’t I know that before we sent you out there to kick the field goal that would’ve possibly won us the game? I should’ve just gone with the Hail Mary. Better chance, if your head wasn’t in the game.
“I don’t know,” Dawson said, shrugging awkwardly. But he knew. It was because he’d wanted so badly to believe he could do all of this anyway. That his focus and his skill were back on the same page and they were within his grasp again. That he could call on them when he needed them again, like he always had before.
“You had Cam, I get that. But, Daws, I’d havestillwanted to know.”
Dawson tried not to feel bitter about Aidan’s words, but that didn’t work very well.
“Sure, I get it,” Dawson said sarcastically, beginning to pull out of Aidan’s grasp.
“Wait, no,” Aidan said, confusion creasing his face. And then it was even worse when the comprehension dawned. “I didn’t mean it like that.I meant, I would’ve wanted to be there for youas a friend. I would’ve still sent you out there to make that kick. You didn’t miss because you were distracted from what happened with Ackerman’s case this week. You missed ’cause it was a really fucking long field goal, and frankly, it wasthisclose to going in. What happened with your lawyer and your agent? I don’t think it had anything to do with what went down today.”
Dawson wanted to believe it so badly. But it was hard, when last year was right there, hovering in the back of his mind, as irrefutable evidence.
“I know you want to think that’s true,” Dawson started to say, but then Aidan smacked him, actually pretty hard, on his shoulder pad.
“No,” Aidan countered, “Idothink that’s true. But I think the person you really need to convince is yourself.”
He patted Dawson again, more softly this time, and turned to go.
“Hey,” Dawson said, reaching out and catching his arm. “What do you mean by,You had Cam?”
Aidan rolled his eyes. “You cannot be this dense.”
“I’m notdense,” Dawson argued.
“You actually fucking are. He’s the first person you told, wasn’t he?”
“Well, we were out to dinner, so yeah,” Dawson said.
Aidan shot him a long-suffering look. “My point exactly.”
“Friends and hookups go out to dinner.”
“Notallthe time,” Aidan said. “Listen, if you wanna lie to yourself, knock yourself out. But the moment it fucks up the rookie, I’m gonna be on your ass.”
“What, this isn’t you on my assnow?” Dawson asked sullenly.
“Oh, buddy, this isn’t even close,” Aidan said, patting him. “You wanna go out to Vault with us? I think Levi’s getting a group together. Thought I might talk to Nate, too, if I can get him alone.”
“Nah. I’m actually meeting up with my agent.”
Aidan raised an eyebrow.
“I already fired Simon. The lawyer. But Alex?” Dawson sighed. “We’ve been together my whole career. I don’t think this was his idea. Not that I’m really in a place to trust anything either of them say, but their stories were at least consistent about that.”
