“No.” My attempt at sounding strong comes out as utterly pathetic, and I hate myself for it. “I refuse to be the reason that nobody gets paid.”
“This is insane. I’m not risking your life for some cash.”
“Give me a couple of hours. I actually do feel slightly better,” I say, forcing myself to sit up.
He stares at me and I know he’s trying to figure out if he can believe me or not. “No, forget it. I can't risk it.”
“Will, please, I'm begging you. Just give me a little more time.” I put my hand on his. “What I'm saying makes sense and you know it. We can get on the raft and go as far as possible by river. That'll bring us closer to town in case I make a quick recovery, and closer to help if I don’t.”
He sighs heavily and rubs the back of his neck. After a horribly long and uncomfortable moment, he says, “Fine. I'll go collect some fresh water and some peppermint leaves for your nausea. If you can hold that down, we'll get on the raft. If you can't, I call for help.”
With that, he zips up the tent and I hear his footsteps disappearing. As soon as he's gone, I set my plan into action, forcing myself to get up and crawl outside. I drag myself over to the satellite phone. I grab the largest rock I can reach, lift it high into the air, then drop it directly on the phone. Then I stare, shocked at what I’ve done. I may have just killed myself with that one simple act because if I don’t turn the corner very soon, I’ll be dead by tomorrow.
“Okay, Arabella,” I whisper. “Woman up because it's do or die time.”
But first, a little nap right here on this nice dirt.
24
Only Fools Rush In…
Will
By the timeI walk back toward camp, my pockets are filled with peppermint leaves and my chest is emptied of most of its anger. In its place is a huge lump of guilt. There's no reason for me to be kicking her when she's already down. It's not like Arabella is the first person to ever make a mistake. Besides, it’s my fault for letting her wander around out here alone. I knew better than to think she could handle herself.
I slice a nearby bamboo shoot, then fill both of our empty water bottles. When they’re full, I set back on the trail so I can apologize. The truth is, I don't like seeing her so weak and greenish and pale. There's a part of me that's well… a little bit… uncomfortable with that.
Okay, a lot uncomfortable.
Fine. Terrified. Is that better?
She matters to me in a way no one has before, and when she got sick, all I could think was: I can’t lose her. I don’t know if I’ll survive if I do. I need to apologize to her and tell her the truth, which is that I love her. As insane as that is to say or even feel after only knowing her for such a short time, it’s a fact. I love her, and I would give up everything for her. I'm about to give up my career, Matilda, and my friends, when they find out why we’ve been out here so long, leaving them all to wait. But somehow, if I know I have her, I can live without the rest.
The sky is growing dark as I reach camp. My eyes land on the sight of Arabella passed out on the ground next to the satellite phone. Christ, she must've been trying to call for help.
I drop everything and run over to her, kneel next to her on the ground. I touch her cheeks with both hands, finding them unusually hot and damp, even for this climate. “Arabella, come on, sweetheart. Don't do this, okay? You need to wake up.”
I grab a water bottle and pour some onto my hands and pat it onto her face, but she doesn’t wake up. I pour some into her hair, praying it will work. “Come on, Belle. Come on. Wake up already.”
My heart pounds in my chest and panic fills my blood as I stare at her lifeless body. A sob swells in my chest. “Do not die, Arabella! You can’t die.”
I lift her up a bit and kiss her cheek. “Wake up, okay?” I beg, my voice breaking. Nope. I can’t do this. I am not built for this shit. This is exactly what I get for falling in love with someone. “Come on, Arabella! Wake up!” I shout.
Her eyes flutter and she whispers, “Don't be mad.”
I shake my head, laughing through tears I never thought I would have. “Never. I could never be angry with you.”
She gives me a weak smile, even though her eyes are still closed. “Thank you. I love you, Will. I did it for you.”
Uh-oh. “Did what, Belle? What did you do?” I ask, the hair on the back of my neck standing up on end. I glance around, trying to figure out what she's talking about, then for the first time, I notice the phone and see the rock on top of it. “No, no, no, no, no. Tell me you didn't.”
“We can make it. I just need a bit more time.”
Her head lolls to the side and she passes out again, leaving me alone with my fear and fury.
Panic fills me, and for once in my life, my blood runs cold. It's too much for me to take in and I sit motionless next to her while I try to make a decision. I need to get her to a hospital as quickly as possible. The show is over. My career is done. But the only thing that matters is keeping her alive.
I stand and hop to my feet, then set to work taking apart the lean-to. I grab all of our supplies. Once I have everything loaded on the raft, I pick up Arabella, lay her down on top of a sleeping bag on the raft, and wrap her in the other one. Then I drag the raft to the river, and with one big push, set off into the darkness, hoping for a swift and uneventful ride through the night. By morning, we should be almost at a town along the river called Wasapi, where I can find a doctor. All I can do now is stay awake, steer the raft, and pray that she’ll make it until we get there.
