I turn to Liam with an apologetic expression, but he doesn’t let me off the hook. He just purses his lips, raises and lowers his eyebrows, then shuts the door, leaving me standing with my bananas swinging in the wind.
* * *
“So, now what do I do?” I ask Lauren, who’s been listening to me pour out all the drama of the last few days, starting with Thursday night and ending with my tirade against the nasty eight-year-olds. She’s cooking supper while I rant.
Lauren lets out a long breath. “Wow, Abby, that is … wow.”
“I know. I was awful. I just got so mad, I blew up.”
“Urgh, that makes me feel all squishy inside just thinking about it,” she says.
“Well, thanks for that,” I say, hoping she can hear my eyes roll.
“One thing’s for sure, you can never show your face at that school again.”
“I know.”
“And honestly, after the fertilized egg comment, I’m not even sure you should show your face around Liam either.”
I groan, and flop onto my bed, covering my face with a decorative pillow. Walt hops up onto my bed and sniffs my ear, his whiskers tickling my cheek.
“That’s it. I’m out. I can’t be a part of this. I’m not built for emotional roller coasters,” I say. “This is way too hard. And it’s not the ‘does he or doesn’t he’ thing that’s the problem—although it sucks. It’s watching a child you care about get her heart crushed and knowing you really can’t do anything to make this world a less evil place for her. We were right not to bring children into this world.”
“Umm, I think it’s too late for you to just say ‘peace out’ to these people. The little girl clearly sees you as the mother she wishes she had. You can’t just take off on her.”
Banging my head on the mattress, I say, “I know. What was I thinking?”
“Well, who knows? Maybe Liam will decide it’s for the best if you slowly taper off your relationship with them.”
“Yeah, maybe. That would be for the best. I obviously don’t know what the hell I’m doing in the parenting department. Not that I’m a parent, but you know …”
“I knew what you meant. The truth is, you’d learn.”
Shaking my head, I say, “I doubt it. I’m too late getting into the game.” I sit up and look at myself in the mirror. “No, I can’t do this. Tomorrow morning when he comes over, I’ll just apologize and tell him we should just back things up a bit. See if he can find a new after-school sitter. It would be for the best.”
“Well, you may be getting ahead of yourself here. I’m not sure he’s going to think this is as big a deal as you do.”
“You didn’t see his face. He was mortified to be seen with me,” I answer.
“Why don’t you call him? Otherwise, you’re going to drive yourself crazy.”
“Yeah, I should do that.”
“Okay, I’m sorry, sweetie,” Lauren says, “I wish I could talk longer but we’re about to sit down for dinner and it’s the first time Drew and I have had a meal together since last week.”
“Right, okay. Tell him I say hi.”
“Will do.”
Instead of phoning, I take the coward’s way out and text. Just checking to see how Olive is doing.
A minute later, I get an answer.She’s surviving. We’re snuggled up watching a movie. I’ll see you in the morning.
Well, if that wasn’t Canadian for ‘you’ve done enough. Leave us alone, psycho,’ I don’t know what is. I toss my phone onto the bed and run a nice hot bath.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
It is not the strength of the body that counts, but the strength of the spirit.
