“That’s all right. So am I.” I wipe my fingers and straighten up as two more cats appear. These two are much smaller Siamese cats. One of them hisses at me, jumping sideways across the room with his back arched and tail straight up. I flinch and hold my arms tight to my chest.
“That’s Milo,” Bree says, picking up the angry cat and rubbing his neck. “He’s not a fan of men in general, so probably don’t try to touch him.”
“Good tip. Thanks.”
The other cat, who looks exactly like the angry one, rubs against my leg.
“That’s Puddy Tat. She’s the friendly one of the two. But if you don’t give her attention right away, she’ll claw her way up your body which hurts so much more than you’d think.”
“Brilliant. Exactly how many cats do you have?”
“Zero. My aunt has three cats.”
I nod. “One joy-drooler, one man-hater, and one clone to the cat I shouldn’t touch who will claw at me if I don’t try to touch her immediately. Got it.”
“Yup,” she says with an apologetic smile.
“This is going to be an adventure, isn’t it?”
CHAPTER 14
Life Lessons from Scully and Mulder
Brianna
Wedding Dress Shopping WhatsApp Thread
AMBER: Hey peeps! Today’s the big day! We’re meeting at Valencia's at 1 p.m. sharp. With any luck, we can find the perfect bridesmaid's dresses before Bree has to leave for work.
KANDI: One word: backless.
VALERIE: Ooh! Sexy!! YES!
QUINN: I’m in. I’ve been working on getting rid of my tan lines.
ME: See you at one!
Wednesday To-Do’s
Quality Time with Izzy!
Scrub disgusting toilets, tubs, sinks
Hopefully figure out WTF is wrong with mower, fix it, and mow grass
Laundry (whites, darks, colours)
Dress Shopping with the stick women/find graceful way to get out of having to humiliate self by wearing backless dress in front of everyone I know
Study Torts—chapters 11-15
Make healthy supper
Lose twenty pounds by July
“Okay, Bree, you’ve got this. You may have thirty hours of stuff and only six hours to do it in, but you’ll get it all done because you are Superwoman.” I stare at my reflection in the mirror, but the woman staring back doesn’t seem convinced. She looks like she wants to crawl back into bed for a few days of blissful sleep. “Nope. Not an option. Don’t even let yourself think about it.”
Tying my hair back into a ponytail, I hurry to the kitchen with that sense of dread filling my belly again. Urgh. Backless dresses and big boobs are not exactly compatible. Double D’s with no bra is no bueno. They’ll be sitting somewhere south of my rib cage the entire day. I’ll just have to put my foot down. Either that or I’ll have to put my boobs down. If the rest of the bridesmaids want to show off their backs, they can do it at the rehearsal dinner.
