“I do hope you will," Evi says, smiling brightly at him. "You're such a handsome young man, it would be a shame if you couldn't find that special someone because you have a slight body odour issue to deal with. Well, not slight, really..."
Snapping to my senses, I say, “Evi, I'm afraid you've lost your bonsai friends. You'll want to catch up with them, I'm sure."
"Yes, of course. Thank you so much for seeing us, Arthur." She pats me on the cheek and then glides off in the direction of the group, leaving Vincent and I staring at each other awkwardly for a moment.
Vincent opens his mouth and says, “Sir, have you ever noticed the scent ofcheeseemanating from me?"
"Never. I don't know what she's talking about,” I say, shaking my head vigorously. “Perhaps she has some medical condition that causes her to smell things that aren’t there. Is it blue cheese people smell when they're having a stroke?"
"I believe that's toast, sir."
"Righto,” I say with a nod.
He sniffs his arm a bit, then says, “I guess there might be a slight odor.”
“No! Ridiculous,” I say, moving my face closer and standing near him, wiggling my nose so it looks like I’m sniffing – but I’m really just holding my breath. “Nothing. Perfectly normal.”
“I don’t know. She may be right. I mean, I do eat a lot of blue cheese, to be honest,” he says, his eyebrows folding down. “I just really love it, but if it makes me smell bad, maybe I should give it up.”
***
IMAKE IT TO OUR APARTMENTat exactly 10:06. Tessa gives me that little eyebrow raise that says I'm late, which I already know, thank you very much.
"Oh good, there you are. I was starting to think we’d have to put off the mini-break."
"Believe me, I’d have given anything to have had a better morning,” I say, trying to curb the exasperation in my voice.
“What happened?”
I take a deep breath and decide it’s not worth mentioning how her mother derailed my morning and insulted Vincent. She’d just end up feeling very embarrassed and angry, which really isn’t the point of this weekend. Although, between you and me, there is no possible way those people will still be living in this palace when the babies arrive. The last thing I need is to have them upsetting Tessa any more than they already have. If I could have them out today, I’d bloody well do it.
***
BY THE TIME WE REACHDidsbury, I’ve all but forgotten about Tessa’s parents, and I’m sure it has everything to do with the fact that we’re about to have three days away from them. I've given Xavier the weekend off so he can work out or paint landscapes or whatever it is he likes to do in his free time (which has the added bonus of giving the babies three Xavier-free days to get used to theirrealfather’s voice).
When we get out of the limo, the crisp fall air greets us. Tessa, who’s been napping for almost the entire ride, stretches her arms out and sighs, this time sounding happy. Turning to me, she smiles and says, "Let's go for a walk after lunch. It's such a beautiful day."
"There's nothing I'd like more." Okay, that's not entirely true because what I'd really like to do is go directly to bed after lunch, and I'm a little bit nervous that if we go for a long walk, as soon as we get back inside, she’ll fall asleep. But this weekend is more of a marathon than a sprint, isn’t it? Also, it’s not about sex, I swear. Well, maybe a little...
Mrs. Potts greets us at the door, and she and Tessa exchange a big hug whilst Mrs. Potts tells her how glowingly beautiful she looks. Thank you, Mrs. Potts. That ought to help. We sit down to lunch almost as soon as we arrive. Beef stew and warm buns straight from the oven. Dessert is chocolate soufflé with vanilla bean ice cream—Tessa’s favourite.
I watch as she closes her eyes on the first bite and smiles. “Thank you so much for giving Xavier the weekend off. It’s so nice to eat without his disapproving stare.”
“I thought you could use a break from all the mothering.”
Tessa chuckles. “Between Xavier and my actual mum living with us, I’m being mothered to death.”
“If it gets to be too much, I can have him reassigned.”
“Could you have my mother reassigned instead?”
I chuckle. “Just say the word. But the offer’s open to get you a new bodyguard if you like.”
“No, I wouldn’t dream of it. It would crush him. Xav’s a bit much at times, but his heart’s in the right place.” Tessa takes another bite of her dessert. “The truth is, there isn’t another person I’d trust to be around when the babies are born. He’d never let anything happen to them.”
I stiffen a bit at her words. “Neither would I.”
She looks taken aback for a second. “I didn’t mean it likethat, Arthur. I meant when you can’t be near.”
