Kira wasn’t concerned he’d guessed right. Graydon had done the same. Even an idiot would be able to see her motives.
“It’s not a bad plan,” the Overlord said, settling in his seat. “But theuhva nais simply the first hurdle on the way to theadva ka. If you pass, you’ll be appointed a mentor. They will determine when you advance. Passing theuhva nawon’t solve all your problems.”
"It's a start." That's all she needed.
Tuann law was clear on this point. Those who passed theadva kaachieved a certain level of freedom not available to those who hadn't. They could choose their course. Whether that was to pledge themselves to their old House or find a new one was up to them,
"As long as your path leads you to the Tuann," he said softly. "Right now, you think you will be able to leave and never return. That is a fallacy."
"Oh?" There was danger in Kira's tone. She didn't like threats—especially when they came from supposed family.
He shifted, his expression relaxing as if her response had assured him of something important. "The humans have something called an energy vampire in their myths, yes?"
Kira stared at him, not answering.
He continued with an air of finality. "It is as good an example as any. Tuann are dependent on our links with others and the Mea'Ave. One of the reasons yourkistarted to poison you was because you had no access to the Mea’Ave when grief broke your few connections. Spend too long away from the Mea’Ave or your brethren, and it will start happening again."
An instinctive denial filled Kira. "Quillon said it was because I used too muchkitoo quickly."
"He is right, but what he no doubt hesitated to tell you was that trauma starts the process," her uncle said. "Devastating loss coupled with an explosive release ofki. You never replaced any of those relationships, did you?"
Kira's gaze shifted away from him as she stared unseeing at the wall.
"Deprived of the emotional and physical links to others can cause a Tuann to fade. The Mea'Ave sustains us as we sustain it. You'll always be tied to us. Accept it as your due and adjust your goals to take that into account," he told her.
Her gaze snapped to his. "I'm ninety-two. For a human, that's not half bad."
He studied her, judging her seriousness. After a moment, he shook his head. "No, you're not the sort to give in. You've seen too much of death to be any other way." Hie expression filled with certainty. "You'll keep fighting because to do otherwise would dishonor those you've lost."
Quiet fell between them.
"Tell me I'm wrong," he challenged.
"You're wrong." There was no hesitation in Kira's answer.
"Liar." His chin dipped as a faint smile touched his lips.
Kira's jaw flexed, hating he knew her that well. He was right. She could no more let death take her than Jin could resist a challenge.
Her uncle reached out and touched the disrupter. "This can help you learn to manage yourki, but it can't change reality."
Kira held his gaze, unable to hide the stubbornness that refused to accept his words.
He sat back. "I'm sure you'll need time to come to terms with this."
There was no coming to terms. Kira wouldn’t let her life be derailed. Even if what he said was true, she'd find a way around it. If she had to make regular visits to Tuann worlds to get her dose of Mea'Ave that's what she would do.
Her uncle's face was thoughtful as he considered her. "You've caused a stir. No one, not even an oshota, has ever attempted that course alone and walked away. You took a risk. The drones might not cause death, but they can burn out your mind."
"Maybe now you and yours will stop treating me like I'm a child in need of saving," Kira suggested.
His lips twisted. "I'm nearly two thousand years old as humans measure it. You'll always be a child to me."
Kira blinked, unable to compute the magnitude of his age. He looked maybe middle-aged, if she stretched it. The only clue to his long years was the press of experience hiding in his eyes. The sort that said he'd seen and done everything and lived to tell the tale.
"Didn't expect that, did you?" He seemed amused by her surprise. "The Tuann are an old race. Our children are rare and precious because of it."
The way he said it caught Kira's attention. "How many children did you lose to the Sorrowing?"
