Kira ignored the lance of pain Blue's words caused. "So now I'm the villain. Because I won't give you what you want?"
Blue's gaze dropped, but not before Kira caught the flash of defiance.
"Tell me,Friend." The last word held a vicious bite. "How many wars must I fight for you? How many friends do I have to lose before you consider it enough?"
Blue didn't answer. An angry scoff escaped Kira as she rubbed her forehead.
"I can guess your reason for being here, but why Raider?"
Blue's jaw worked. "You're smart. I'm sure you can figure it out if you try. You always were good at knowing a person's motivations."
There was bitterness in her words.
Kira looked out at the ocean. "Theadva ka."
Blue lifted a shoulder.
"You think if a human passes theadva ka, it'll open doors that are currently closed to you."
It was an elegant solution to a complicated problem. If humans demonstrated the discipline and tenacity it took to overcome one of the Tuann's most difficult rites, it would lend them credibility they currently lacked.
Kira suspected this brainchild came courtesy of Himoto or Jace. It had their fingerprints all over it. Both men would prefer a solution that worked within the confines of Tuann society. Use their own culture against them, and not even they could deny a human's place beside them.
Raider was the most logical choice. Physically, he was among the top five percent of humans, and his history with Kira would mean he had an advantage where another wouldn't.
Kira focused on Blue, her voice hard. "The Tuann told you the world gate was off-limits. I expect you to listen."
Blue tapped her fingers against her knee. "It's been a long time since you were my captain. I no longer have to follow your orders. You abandoned us."
"Ah, there it is. I was wondering when this would come."
"What's that supposed to mean?" Blue asked.
"It's your MO. When denied the newest shiny thing, you go on the attack. You did it in Atlas. You're doing it now."
Blue scoffed. "That's rich coming from you. The moment you face the tiniest bit of pain, you take off."
The peace Kira had managed to obtain lying on the roof popped like ephemeral soap bubbles. Pleasant while they lasted but gone all too soon.
"I needed you after Rothchild," Blue confessed. "We all did. We were family, and you left us. Jace told me you were in a coma for several years, but we both know you walked away long before that. You were going to do it again if Himoto hadn't hung up on you."
Kira stilled. She hadn't realized Blue knew about that.
"Jace told me," Blue confessed. "He thought I should know."
"He doesn't want you getting attached." Kira's chest tightened at the betrayal and hurt in Blue's face. She hated knowing she was the one who put it there. It reminded her of the first time she'd met Blue, hiding in a dumpster, a stuffed bear clutched to her chest, more feral than human. Everyone Blue knew had been long dead, and she'd spent weeks surviving in a city overrun with Tsavitee.
Blue wasn't the only civilian Kira had saved that trip, but she was the only one who'd stuck like a burr to Kira's side and refused to let go.
"I understand why you left," Blue said, calm again. "I never blamed you for it. You needed to heal, and it was impossible to do that with constant reminders of them."
Kira's mouth tightened. Blue was half right. She had needed time and space. Something in critically short supply during a war. The flow of battle didn't always leave you able to take time to heal your psyche. Sometimes you had to push through even when you were broken. Even when a large part of you wanted to lay down and not get up for the next few decades.
She'd left the Curs, but she hadn't left the war.
That had to sting for those she'd been closest to. People like Blue. And Raider.
"What else did Jace tell you?" Kira asked, her attention fixed on the ocean.
