“But not at forty-two,” I point out and glance again at the front counter. Why are there no customers to save me from this conversation? My leg starts to bounce. I should try and stop it, as I don’t always like customers to see me doing it, but I don’t. Can’t seem to care enough.
“You think Giles was born with intercostal muscles like a draining board?”
I blink at my mother. “What even are intercostal muscles? And how doyouknow about them?”
She waves a hand round dismissively. “You forget I trained as a nurse. And once I had a boyfriend who was a body builder from Bergamo.” She looks up at the ceiling with a rueful expression. “One of those things was a lot more fun than the other. Anyway, what I am trying to say is that Giles had to start somewhere and even if that was a long time ago, that doesn't mean he's forgotten what it's like to be a beginner.”
“But the last thing he will want to do is hang out with a beginner. Really I did him a favour by completely ignoring him.”
Mum's face falls. “Dio mio. You ignored him?PoveroGiles.”
“What do you meanpoor Giles? He's a big boy. A very big boy, by the way,” I say, thinking again of the stretch of his chest and the thickness of each of his limbs.
“It's all a front,” Mamma says. "Radia told me he's a lot more sensitive than he looks. She once called him a teddy bear, in fact.”
“A teddy bear?”
“She told me that he paid off her student loans the first year she worked for him.”
I bring my hands to my face. “Ah, Mamma, you're killing me!”
I hear a ding and she moves to the oven behind me. “The good news is I have an idea on how you can rectify this.”
“You do?” I turn to watch her pull on an oven glove and open the door.
“Yes. You're going to make his favourite coffee and take one of these croissants over to Giles and apologise for ignoring him.”
I snort. “I am not.” I fold my arms.
Mamma finally gives me the scathing look I've been expecting. “Yes, you are. Giles and Radia are two of our best customers, not to mention Radia is Chloe's girlfriend. You don't want to burn that bridge.”
My leg is shaking so hard it’s actually moving the rest of my body. The café is quiet. And I do still feel like a huge idiot for treating Giles the way I did.
“Fine,” I grit out and take off my apron again.
*****
McCannon & Rivers is one of many bespoke tailors in this corner of London but it stands out with its large, wood panel-framed windows and the shop's name painted on the glass in elegant gold calligraphy. I've been here a few times before, delivering orders or just popping in to say hello to Radia on my way somewhere else, but I've never had sweating palms as I make way towards the shop. I could blame the still warm chocolate-filled croissants in the brown paper bag in my hand or the coffee I'm carrying but I know it's more because I have to walk in there andapologise for being a massive wanker, something I often am but somehow manage to get away with, most of the time.
I'm about fifteen metres away from the door when it suddenly opens and two bodies spill out. Holding hands as they come down the steps outside the door, I immediately recognise Radia and Chloe, who is pulling a suitcase behind her. She must have just got back from holiday, and of course her first stop was Radia. I smile thinking about how sweet this is and how happy I am that Chloe – a hard-working, friendly and reliable colleague and friend – has found what very much looks like love with Radia.
In fact, they're so caught up in each other, heads bowed close together as they walk up the street in the opposite direction, that I don't even call out to get their attention. Instead, I just watch as they walk away and I feel something else join my delight for Chloe, or rather it pops it like a balloon. Jealousy. It's hot and heavy and ugly and I don't like it.
Just as well I have a different shitty feeling to focus on instead: embarrassment and shame at running away from a perfectly decent bloke in the gym.
With a rough sigh, I open the door and walk in.
“Marcello!” Giles says as he looks up from behind the glass-top counter which stretches out along the right-hand side. He looks freshly showered and groomed - unlike myself - and his voice and face suggest he's very surprised to see me but not necessarily in a bad way. At least I don’t think so. Or rather, I hope not.
“Er, hi, Giles,” I stutter and close the door behind me. “Is now a good time?”
Giles looks at my hands. “If you're here with coffee and baked goods, now is a very good time.”
“I am.” I walk over to place the cup and bag on the glass counter that stands between us. “One of Mamma’s chocolate croissants, fresh out of the oven, and an extra hot, extra shot latte.”
Giles’ hand reaches for the bag. “Hmm, it's still warm.” He makes a gravelling humming sound that has me smiling and thinking about what my mother said, 'A teddy bear' who appreciates freshly baked pastries. What on earth was I thinking being intimidated by him?
“Listen,” I say as Giles wastes no time opening up the bag. “I want to apologise for what happened earlier, at the gym. I acted like a dick.”
