I squint up at Mr. Smiley-Smiley as Tank opens the door for us. I’m not sure I deserve him tonight, which is a crazy change of opinion to happen over a week. “Can you do that?”
“Iama trained actor, darling. Who would’ve thought I could’ve pulled off Peter Jones? I deserve an Emmy.”
“Fair enough.”
The house’s foyer has been converted to the host stand, naturally. I’m relieved to see the old wood trim hasn’t been painted over, but some of the stained glass has been removed.
There’s a page on the college’s website with a walk-through of the old house.
Everyone in my family knows this building inside and out.
I loved the stained glass.
I also loved the chandeliers and the grand staircase that I can’t quite see ahead of me and the banisters and the wallpaper and the worn wooden floors with the rectangular stains where rugs once protected those portions of the floor from being faded from the sun like the rest of the wood.
The hostess slides into the foyer and looks up at us as she reaches the mahogany stand, then blanches. “Oh, shit.”
“Reservations for two and a half for Barney,” Simon says pleasantly. “Do you need the email confirmation?”
“Oh, shit shitshit,” she whispers again as her eyes flit between us.
I squeeze Simon’s elbow, mostly because I suddenly don’t know what to do.
The theory of arriving at Jake’s grand opening on the arm of his favorite actor to make a scene is a lot different from the reality of beingin the scene.
I’m better at pulling my brothers out of trouble and being a smart-ass in places where I’m comfortable than I am at causing trouble behind enemy lines.
Parking my bus three inches over the line of where it’s supposed to be?
Child’s play.
Getting arrested when I have proof I did nothing wrong?
I can handle that, even if it was awful.
Making a large public nuisance of myself on purpose?
I need to tell Simon.
I need to tell himright nowwhat’s going on.
“My man called an hour ago to alert the staff thatBarneywas a pretend name,” he says smoothly, and I realize he has no idea she’sshitting because of me.
He thinks she’s having a reaction tohim.
Breathe, Bea. Breathe breathe breathe.
I need to tell him.
And I will.
Once we’re seated.
“Yeah, but I thoughtBarneywould be like, Margot Merriweather-Brown or like, one of the Rutherford brothers,” the young woman says with another terrified glance at me.
“The Rutherford brothers? With the Razzle Dazzle family?” Simon asks.
The hostess sends another panicked look my direction. “They live over in Albany. I mean, they used to. They still come around sometimes when they visit the area.”
