“Coach Jackson would need a personality implant before I’d consider dating him.”
She takes a long suck off the juice box while I pull the car back onto the highway, and then she falls silent for a few miles.
And when she finally says something again, it’s not good. “He’s a really good coach. I know there are the weird things with him being pissed that he can’t use the ranch the way Uncle Tony let him, and I don’t like the way he looks at you—it makes me want to throw up in my mouth and kick him in the balls—but he’s never treated me any differently because of any of that.”
My biggest issue?
I agree.
Maybe not about thekicking him in the ballspart—not so keen on my teenager doing that unprovoked—but definitely about him not treating her any differently than he treats the other kids. “People are complicated. They can be good coaches and teachers and want things in conflict with what we want and also be attractively unattractive to the parents of the kids they coach and teach.”
“Vivian told me that Coach Jackson dated her aunt a few years ago and left her a total disaster. Like, she had to move toRhode Islandto getaway from him. And then Abigail was like,Oh my God, my neighbor too. And apparently he was a total ass when he was in Mr.Simmerton’s class back in the Stone Age when he was in high school, but I don’t think anyone should be judged on who they were in high school.”
I smile at her. “So you wouldn’t judge me on who I was in high school?”
And there’s another eye roll. “I would. Partly. But not all the way. Some people are still finding themselves in high school, and they’re hurting and hormonal, and they don’t understand the damage they’re causing. But if they get therapy and do the work and overcome their traumas, I think they can be good people too. But only if they do the work, you know?”
These are the times when I think teenagers could do a better job of running the world than we adults do. And also when what they learn on the internet scares the crap out of me.
I can’t imagine using the phraseovercome their traumasback when I was in high school.
“Normal isn’t real,” I say. “We all have things we need to work through.”
“Like being raised and trained by embezzlers?”
Don’t twitch, Maisey. Do. Not. Twitch.“Grandma was a good mom in all the ways that count. People can be good at relationships but bad at following the law. Or they can be good at following the law but bad at relationships. Case in point? My marriage. Though for all that my marriage to your father ended poorly, I’ll always be grateful that I met him and went into business with him young enough that he could correct my misperceptions about how books, billing, and payroll are handled.”
Yeah.
There were signs young that Mom wasn’t the best role model in business.
And she gets a gold medal,I can hear my therapist friend saying.
But Junie snorts. “If that’s the best you got out of your relationship with Dad—”
“I got you.You’rethe best part.”
“Ew, sappy.”
“Ew, teenagers being uncomfortable with truth.”
“Would you jump Coach Jackson’s bones if you didn’t get off on the wrong foot with him after you got him thrown off his horse, and if he wasn’t my teacher and coach?”
“Can youpleasesave some of these questions for when I’m not paranoid that an elk or an antelope or a wolf is about to cross the road in front of us? And thereareother cars on the road that I shouldn’t swerve into.”
Nope. She can’t. “Even I know it’s really dumb to put yourself at risk of a lawsuit by having kids working on fixing fences and playing in a falling-down barn on your property. I don’t get why he’s being such an ass about it.”
“It’s complicated, Junie.” I don’t tell her not to sayass, because if cussing is the worst of her rebellious ways, I’m totally fine with that.
“Mom, I know that meansI’m going to pretend it’s complicated because I don’t want to talk about it right now, but you actually nailed it, and you’re right, Coach Jackson is being an ass about that.”
Time to deflect. “You want to have a driving lesson this weekend? If you don’t want to drive the truck, I think I can afford a slightly used sedan with really great airbags for you.”
Doesn’t work. She grunts. “I’m counting the times Dad says he’s going to come visit. He’s said it like seventeen times already. But do you know what he hasn’t said? He hasn’t saidWhen’s your next soccer game, hon? I’ll fly out for the afternoon and heckle your coach until he lets you play. And you know he could. He just signed a contract for like five million dollars for his new show.”
“Juniper Louisa Spencer,I love you. And I don’t know if I can love you enough for both of the parents who are supposed to be here for you and all of the grandparents you never got to know or who got themselves sent to prison, butI love you. And I will put you first until the day you leave my house as an adult, and for the record, I don’t mean the dayyou become a legal adult and leave. I mean the day youfeellike enough of an adult to spread your wings and fly on your own.”
She doesn’t answer.
