Moments when she’s completely unguarded. Letting go and letting herself enjoy the lighter side of life.
I want inside her castle.
I want to find where thatfunpart of her is, where theadventurouspart of her is, and I want to help her let it out.
And right now, I get to watch her justbe. And enjoy herself justbeing. And laugh like nothing else in the world matters.
And know that she trusts me to be the guy she shares this moment with.
“We can’t go to dinner,” she gasps between peals of laughter.
That’s the best idea I’ve heard all day. But when she says it, I can’t help the way I brace myself like this is a trap.
Liking Laney has never ended well for me. And no amount of telling myself that I’m so much better for her today than I was in high school can alleviate the instinctive fear that letting myself like her again will end just as badly.“Why?”
“God, Theo, things justhappenwhen you’re around. They’ll probably serve peach flambé for dessert, and just because you’re in the room, the flames will go too high and set the banana trees on fire.”
I swallow.
Once in high school, late enough that I had access to a car and could drive, Emma had a fancy dinner for some honors thing that everyone’s families went to. It was all of thegoodkids, thesmartkids, therightkids, and then there was me.
And then there was Delaney.
She had looked like she’d just been informed every college in the nation had rejected her because grades weren’t real, and her entire life was upside down.
I knew why.
Her preppy boyfriend had just dumped her because theywanted different things out of life.
And what I wanted was to throw her over my shoulder, blow off the dinner, and take her up to Marmot Cliff to look at the stars and show her how much all of the fancy shit and the stuffy shit and the assholes didn’t matter when you could see the Milky Way, but I knew she’d tell me thatwasn’t proper.
So I blew off the dinner and took myself up there.
And I didn’t enjoy it at all.
My head was back there where Laney was upset, and I was pissed at myself for caring enough to let it ruin a great night up on the cliff, and pissed at myself for not having the courage to offer it to her anyway.
So having her suggest we blow off a family dinner where I’d have to avoid Chandler and avoid Aunt Brenda and avoid making subtle threats to the Sullivan triplets about looking at Laney wrong?
Chandler’s obnoxious laugh drifts through the air, and every muscle in my back tightens.
But then I look at Laney, who’s wiping tears from her eyes, she’s laughing so hard.
And then I glance at the sun sinking low on the horizon between the lanai where family dinner is supposed to be and the black-rock-covered beach closer to where I want to be.
Banana leaves are full of water. Doubt they burn easily.
But she’s not wrong.
If I go in there and something goes wrong, it’ll be my fault, and if there’s one thing I want more than anything for my sister, it’s for her to be happy.
With or without me around.
I nod once and take her by the elbow, ignoring the shiver that races up my arm at the feel of her soft skin beneath my fingertips. “I’ll drive.”
14
Laney
