She’d probably be right to believe that.
And so I’m battling a woody again as Laney and I meet Emma right off the lanai where we’re having dinner tonight. Chandler’s not here.
Don’t care why. I’m just grateful I don’t have to worry about looking at him wrong in front of Emma.
Em’s all smiles and light and joy, as always, while she squeals and hugs Laney and asks how her day was.
Laney says nothing about trips to the hospital or kittens or losing her bikini top. It’s onlysuch a beautiful placeandI’m so glad we’re hereandI can’t believe you’re finally getting married.
Is this—is this the two of us being on the same side?
No. No way.
Not getting my hopes up there again.
“Aww, who’s the prettiest baby sister in the history of pretty?” I say when it’s my turn to hug Emma.
“Stop, you goof.”
“But you are.”
She beams at me. And it’s not a regular beam. It’s athis is all finally coming together the way I’ve dreamed it would since I was nine years old when I decided I wanted to one day get married at this Hawaiian resort that I saw in a magazine.
It’s a nut-punch kind of beam. I’ve stayed away from her all day, and she’s having the best damn day of her life.
Knock it off,I tell myself.This isn’t about you. Just be happy for her. Be happy for you having a good day too.
And it was a good day.
In retrospect, waking up holding my own dick and not knowing it because my hand was asleep is a story for the ages. Gonna have to use that next time I make a video. Watching Laney with the kittens was good. And I don’t regret telling her I liked her in high school.
Who can’t use the lift of knowing they’re attractive?
Even if we need to work on her not believing me. Never would’ve guessed Laney Kingston had self-esteem issues.
But clearing the air is clearing the air, and I had to tell her if we’re going to move on.
“You’re not so bad yourself,” Emma says to me. “I heard you were quite the superstar with the younger crowd on the beach this morning.”
“Just found where my maturity level fit.”
She rolls her eyes and hugs me again. “Thank you for avoiding Chandler and not being mad at me,” she whispers.
“I ran over a kid at the beach, got sand in my eyes, and had to be taken to the doctor so I wouldn’t go blind,” I whisper back.
She laughs.
But only until she cuts her laugh off, jerks back, and stares at me in horror. “Oh my god, you’re serious.That’swhy you missed lunch?”
She looks between me and Delaney, and when Laney winces and makes thehe’s not lying but we handled it and all is fineface, Em squeaks like I’ve just deflated her joy balloon.
“Nobody died, and I can still see.” I smile at my sister and fling an arm around Delaney’s shoulders. “Brilliant of you to give me a keeper who can handle it all so effortlessly.”
Em flushes. “Theo, I—”
“Theo, you’re right,”I interject in a falsetto.“I’m brilliant, which goes without saying, and Delaney’s much prettier than Chandler’s ancient Aunt Brenda, and I’m glad you recognize what a giant favor I’ve done for you with your date this week.”
“If all he has is that I’m prettier than Chandler’s ancient aunt with the permanent scowl on her face, then I’m doing my job right,” Delaney quips.
