But I can’t say that to her, because I don’t know how I left part of my heart in Wisconsin.
Nothing about that sentence makes sense.
But it’s true.
Naomi and my found family here accept me, no question, no doubts, for exactly who I am. I don’t have to pretend. I don’t have to look good. I don’t have to compete for their love, and when I fuck up, they forgive me.
They even forgive me for still learning how to forgive them when they fuck up too.
And I thought this would be the only place in the world I’d find that acceptance.
But that was before a small-town plumber with dimples and warm brown eyes sneaked into my heart and showed me time and again that we all get to define who we are.
Even if that meansredefining who we are when we don’t like the path we’re on.
“I’m tired,” I confess to Naomi.
Thatis so very true it hurts.
“Of course you are. When’s the last time you got more than four hours of sleep? Come on. We have a little house we’re renting in town here, and you can rest and relax and let me learn this presentation inside and out. Did you bring the truffles?”
One more thing to feel guilty about.
I lied and told Dylan I needed most of the boxes of truffles that Floyd didn’t eat so that I could mail them today, and that I absolutely refused to let him do it for me since I couldn’t live with myself if he were called names in public again just because I made him let me make him into a TikTok star.
I’d feel better about myself if I’d saidso I can get them where they need to be.
Three months ago, the ends would’ve justified the means.
I don’t care if I lie to Gigi. I don’t care if I lie to my father or to Carter.
But I care if I lie to Dylan.
I don’t want to lie to him.
I don’t want to have secrets.
But I don’t want him carryingthissecret. It’s not fair to ask that of him when we’re not serious, no matter how awful I feel for keeping it from him.
I check my phone.
Last update from Sam reports that no one in the school wants to be around her because she’s complaining she’s bored and that her ankle hurts and that nothing tastes good because of the painkillers.
I really played up how much I wanted to taste good soybeans, she texted.Also, Lola totally went through your room sometime last night. I found beef jerky planted in the vegan protein bar boxes and a listening device planted under your bed.
I’m not scared.
I’mfurious.
“Naomi?”
“Uh-oh,” she replies.
“We’re going to kill it with this presentation, and then we’re going to kill Lola Minelli.”
Chapter 32
Dylan
