And he hesitated only a second before putting his arms around her and holding her just as she had always longed to be held.
Kieran planned to maintain distance for as long as she required. He had seen the genuine fear in her movements just now, and while he might never fully understand what sort of pain could cause such a response, he refused to add to it. He had stepped away, allowed her the space to process. Because even though he ached to touch and feel, to continue to bask in the warmth of her, he was not a monster.
Then she had hugged him and it was somehow worse and better than anything else.
Sex and lust he could grasp. Even sworn to remain alone he’d found the odd moment to let go when he was in college. Yes, it was harder to find the time or ability as he got older, but he still understood physical urges and how to control them. The purity of her arms over his shoulders, the probing emotion of her clinging to his chest, aligned with emotion he had not felt since he was a child.
Comfort and serenity.
He was far past caring for Sera, though he still refused to dwell too long on just how far. None of that mattered when she was in his arms.
She pulled back, tears threatening to spill from her eyes. “I’m sorry. I was in my own head and you just felt—I mean wow. You were—”
“No apology necessary. I would hope that you understand you are quite safe to feel however you wish around me.”
She smiled and her cheeks pinched the tears free. “I know this is my very first ball, but… can we go home?”
He felt an answering smile on his lips, the gesture still somewhat unfamiliar. “I have been ready to leave since we got here.”
“Then perfect, we can get our things and go. Because I think it’s only fair not to let you have all the fun.” She dropped a quick kiss against his cheek and then released him. She looked up with a cheeky grin. “Oh please, like you don’t throw lines like that at me constantly.”
Kieran swallowed, debating. On the one hand, he was in no hurry to push Sera past her limits. She clearly harbored great pain regarding sex and her treatment during. On the other, it was Sera’s suggestion. And he was tired of making the prudent choice.
He threaded his fingers with hers and raced for the exit.
Chapter Thirteen
Onceagain,Kieranheldhis composure throughout the grueling ride back to the Winter Court. Sera’s scent was everywhere. On his clothes and his hands. His face. This time he maintained a semblance of distance because there was no getting her out of that dress and back into it inside the confines of his carriage.
And she would be out of that dress the moment he could assure her privacy.
When Joy—had he forgotten to dismiss her? Again? Tomorrow. He’d do it tomorrow—stopped outside the court, Kieran hopped down and scooped Sera into his arms as she tried to step to the ground. He knew the path better than she did, knew where to step and how to avoid ice patches. He did not set her down when he reached his front door, merely adjusted her so he could reach the handle and once free of the bolt, he kicked it in without bothering to shut it.
“Sir—”
The look on his face stopped Meera in her tracks. She opened and closed her mouth, always rather timid even when he wasn’t bearing down on her with a glower that could freeze a glacier. He set Sera down in one fluid motion and snatched her hand to drag her to his side.
“I am not to be disturbed for the foreseeable future,” he instructed, voice dripping with ice.
Meera nodded, a wince indicating she had something to say that would counter his demand and she feared it might be important enough to say it.
Not again. He was not going to let responsibility or obligations keep him from taking Sera upstairs and—
“I thought I sensed a blizzard!”
Kieran’s face morphed to visible irritation, brow drawn and eyes narrowing with lethal focus.
Miles Harrow strolled into his foyer, wearing a jovial smile and still courted by an ambiguous shadow. Given the rage that shocked through Kieran, it would not have surprised him if Miles’s demise turned imminent.
When Miles’s gaze danced around Kieran to Sera, his demeanor shifted. “Damn, I thought you were gorgeous before.”
Sera smiled into her hand. Kieran bared teeth.
“What do you want Harrow?”
Miles’s humor did not wane in the face of Kieran’s unconcealed hostility. He gestured like the reason should be obvious. “Pick up order. For Wraith. One…” he blew out a puff of air and shook his head. “I don’t remember, some kind of necklace or something.”
“He’s here for the Charm,” Sera said, tone slow and placating.
