The thought left a hollow ache in his chest, the hole growing that much bigger with each tether to humanity he severed. Kieran briefly considered walking home, if just for a moment of peace and solitude.
Sera hugged Seth, who she had wrapped in the blanket and held while his teeth chattered. Kieran’s gaze drifted over her shoulder where a vague, shapeless shadow hung just behind her. Cole’s threat, if he had to guess. Her actions and involvement with him had turned Cole’s intention into a focused goal. At least Kieran could monitor her as long as she was with him.
Seth sneezed and groaned like it had caused him pain.
Right. Kieran collected the glacite from under the seat and reached through the back window to set it with the luggage in the storage compartment.
“You couldn’t have done that when I was in here?” Sera snapped.
“You are not biologically weakened by cold temperature. Your friend is. I can hardly preach for inclusivity if I don’t implement it myself.”
She snorted. “I think you just thought it was funny torturing me.”
“I don’t find anything funny,” he admitted. “Not in recent recollection.” Gods above, when was the last time he had laughed and meant it? For the past twenty-something years of his existence he had worked and nothing else. No breaks. No friends. His family had long since passed on. What did he once do for fun? As a child? He couldn’t recall. He couldn’t recall anything from before. The night he lost his younger siblings hadchanged everything. For that was when he had learned that his purpose came with sacrifices.
“That’s… incredibly sad,” she said, and her hostility softened.
He agreed with her, but he did not want to say as much aloud. Sharing emotions meant bonding. Bonding meant caring and affection. Kieran North had vowed to never care about anyone ever again. He dismissed servants, fired interns, and otherwise structured his life to avoid any kind of attachment to others. It was the only way he could be certain he didn’t fail again.
The hollow pit growing in his chest grew tighter. Kieran would make sure Joy had a good reference and continue her salary until she found new employment.
“You should th-thank h-h-him,” Seth’s attempt at a whisper was easily overheard.
“Like hell,” Sera snapped back in her own too-loud-whisper. She brushed her hands up and down her bare arms, but Kieran could already feel the temperature rising. It would border on discomfort soon, but they weren’t far from the Court’s entrance.
Like hell. She was stubborn, that much was clear. Kieran began to remove his coat.
“What are you doing?” she asked, panic catching in her voice.
He held out the coat. “You’re freezing.”
“I don’t want it,” she dismissed, too quickly. Her eyes darted to the garment.
“Suit yourself.” He withdrew his arm, but she snatched the coat. A small, barely there smile quirked his lips. It went unnoticed by his companions, but Kieran noticed. He noticed because the cause had been amusement and that scared him more than anything that had happened so far in this impossibly long night of everlasting surprises.
Then the sound of her breathing deeply brought his attention back to the present and he narrowed his eyes at her. Did she just… inhale his coat?
Sera stiffly looked away from him. And she released the collar of his coat so it dropped away from her face. “What?” She demanded, retreating further into her corner of the carriage.
He recalled a time when his sister had brought home a feral kitten. It had bitten and scratched at every kind gesture offered, until Jerica finally won it over and her touch alone was permitted without violence. Funny. He hadn’t thought about that cat in years.
“Oh my gods, it does.” Seth’s small voice replied to some question Kieran had missed as Seth pulled away from her shoulder.
Sera was swimming in his clothes. The arms flapped like flippers at the end of her arms and she was able to pull the double breasted buttons well past proper alignment. The only pull of the fabric was over the swell of her breasts, which the coat had not been tailored to accommodate.
He looked out the window before taking a very slow deep breath. He thanked the heavens that silence reigned until they reached the Court and were forced to disembark.
A lot had changed in a single night. He didn’t care for change. And his list of problems had grown steadily over the past few hours. No matter. If there was responsibility, he would shoulder it. He had little other purpose in the world. Serve others. Do good.
Do not care about anyone, but take care of everyone.
The mantra was getting rather depressing.
Chapter Three
Inproperdaylight,theWinter Court was gorgeous. Once Sera got past the frigid temperatures, there was beauty in the regal skyline of spruce, fir, and pine against the purples of a rising sun. She’d missed the details in her haste the previous night, but the Courts were almost alien compared to the rest of the city.
Demon Row, the Garrison, the Fells—they all shared similar designs in brick or smoothed plaster. She understood the craftsmanship of the buildings, recognized the materials and their respective properties in relation to each other. As they passed the smaller dwellings closer to the Court’s entrance she didn’t recognize anything about their composition. Purple hued wood. Unsupported obtuse angles when she knew tighter angles with trusses or even a ridge beam was stronger. It was both unsettling and fascinating.
