I might have been pissed at Jake, humiliated, and hurting, but being out here was truly something special. And the fact that he’d brought me up to the top of this particular hill wasn’t lost on me either. Not that I was about to admit it. I had to hold onto what was left of my dignity somehow.
“Is that what you think?” Jake asked, shifting beside me, and even through the darkness, I could see the way he stared at me, daring me to lie.
“You rejected me, Jake.”
“I didn’t reject you.”
“Pretty sure you did. I had my hands on your belt buckle after you’d just finger-fucked the first non-solo orgasm from me in three years, and you said no.”
“Non-solo orgasm?”
“Of course, that’s the part of the sentence you heard.”
“Non-solo orgasm?” he repeated, and I wanted to smack the disbelief from his face and the mischief from his eyes. “The other guys…”
“Other guys?”
“The guys you’ve dated.”
“What guys, Jake? No one’s touched me since you left. No one.”
“You’re serious?”
“Of course, I’m fucking serious. Why would I lie? It’s not exactly something to be proud of,” I spat harshly.
Could this night get any more humiliating? Why didn’t he just roll up my dress and inspect my stretch marks while he was at it? Or maybe he wanted a close-up of my saggy tits?
Without saying a word, Jake grabbed me by the hips and slid me down the mattress before settling himself over me. With his lower half pressing against mine, I could feel the bulge in his jeans throb against my center. He was awakening a beast, and I had no idea how to tame it. And if I’d ever be able to. That orgasm he’d given me, whoa! I knew exactly what memory I’d be using next time I spent some one-on-one time with my favorite purple rabbit.
“Jake,” I panted breathlessly.
“Kellie, listen to me and listen good,” he started, and a shiver raced down my spine.
“Firstly, I did not reject you. Can you feel what you do to me?” he asked, flexing his hips and rubbing his erection against me. “Feel that? That’s you. All you. So don’t you ever think, not even for a second, that I don’t want you.”
I’d already humiliated myself enough tonight. What was one more to round the night out? “Then why…”
“Why did I stop you?”
“Yeah.”
My throat was dry, and my cheeks were burning. Even out here in the cool evening breeze, I was burning up.
“I stopped you because I didn’t have a condom.”
“Oh.”
“And I don’t want to put you in that position.”
“Why? Cause you knocked me up once?” I sassed, but as soon as I saw the wince on Jake’s face, I knew I’d overstepped. “Sorry. Too soon.”
“You’re right, though. I was trying to do the right thing. Trying to think with my head and not my dick.”
“I’m sorry I jumped to conclusions,” I apologized quickly, feeling shitty.
“I wished I had one. I really wanted to fuck you, Kellie. I’ve fucking missed you.”
“You’ve fucking missed me. Or you’ve missed fucking me?” I asked, trying to lighten the mood. I might have been the one who’d acted like a brat, but that wasn’t Jake’s fault. I had a long list of insecurities, and Jake had played right into them. I wasn’t sure I’d ever be able to get past them, but I hoped I would. I really did.
